Tobias
"Sorry, there must be something wrong with my ears. I just thought I heard you suggest going out."
"There's nothing wrong with your ears, Zeke."
"Well, maybe then something's wrong with you." Zeke's forefinger is pointing at my chest and his eyebrows are raised questioningly. "It's not that I don't want to go to the bar, I like the place. It's just that you never want to go there."
"But today I do."
"And why's that?" Zeke asks suspiciously.
"Because I want to do something different for a change."
"Okay, if that's what you want, we'll go. I'll take a shower. Give me a minute."
He's still skeptical, I can tell from the way he scrutinizes me.
I lay back on the couch after Zeke has disappeared into the bathroom and take a long sip from my bottle. The prospect of seeing Tris again tonight makes me smile, even if we can't be ourselves in public.
I'm relieved we've been able to clarify things between us. It was difficult for me to talk about my feelings because I've never learned to let them show. On the contrary, I've spent a lot of time in my life learning how to hide them, suppress them even. But I guess today was a start. It is as if the weight of my past on my shoulders has just gotten a little lighter, with Tris now helping me carry a part of it.
Nonetheless, it worries me that her simulation on Initiation day could give our secret away to the leaders and whoever else will be watching. Although in Dauntless relationships are allowed between members and initiates and everyone is casual about affection shown in public, the rule that prohibits any relation other than educative between instructors and initiates is rather strict. We can be secretive about us until initiation and maybe some days longer. But unless Tris doesn't get over her fear, or at least manages to diminish it, she runs the risk of publicizing what's going on between us. I didn't have the heart to tell her earlier when she confessed she'd probably have a similar simulation again, but I know I eventually have to.
Zeke brings me back into the moment by smacking my shoulder when he walks past me.
"Hey Four, I hope you still want to go. Shauna already went there with Lauren, and she told me she'd wear something sexy."
He winks at me significantly. I roll my eyes at him, although I think I gradually begin to understand him better.
"Yeah, let's go."
We head down to the pit. It's not far from Zeke's place. Instead of climbing one of the steep paths leading up along the stone walls, we cross the pit and enter a small pathway hidden in a corner. A small trail leads us downwards into the rock and around a corner to a flight of stairs. The music from the bar is already audible, along with chattering voices and laughter. The volume rises as we descend further.
When we reach the entrance, a rusty metal door hanging loosely on its hinges, and enter the cavern, we're immediately part of the crowd. The place is dimly lit and so packed with people it's impossible for me to spot Tris among them.
I follow Zeke through the sea of moving bodies over to the bar, remembering why I don't usually come here often: I don't like big crowds of people. It's not that it makes me anxious; I just don't fancy being touched andpushed aroundby strangers. I prefer hanging out in other places than this.
We manage to order drinks, or at least Zeke does, to be precise. He hands me a glass of I-don't know-what that tastes strongly of alcohol when I take a gulp after clinking glasses with him. Despite my two years of being Dauntless, I still haven't tried all the drinks they mix. Or maybe they just keep making up new ones.
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Discoveries ✔ (Divergent Fourtris Fanfiction)
FanfictionOn the day after they shared their first kiss at the bottom of the chasm, Tris' fear of intimacy comes up during her fear simulation while Tobias is watching. Will the two weeks until initiation be enough to overcome it together to avoid the unwante...