Robbers // Matty Healy

Chapter 26

// It won't mend your heart if it's only a couple of lines. //

MATTY's POV

I haven't heard her voice in so long, it was killing me. She doesn't return my calls, which is understandable, the last thing she texted me was that she was sorry. She drove me crazy. All I wanted was to talk to her and make sure she's okay. Things with my band are going good. We had the next two days off so I'm sure I'll get to doing nothing.

I still constantly check my phone in hopes that maybe I had missed her calling. Maybe she just doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. I screwed up. If I had told her I was leaving ahead of time, maybe we'd be okay. I didn't expect her to break up with me the way she did though. All of this was all unexpected. What was I supposed to do? I know she's read my texts and heard the voicemails I've been leaving her. I don't know what else there is to do. I miss her so much. I thought about dropping everything and flying back to LA, but it wouldn't be fair to the other guys. I'd do anything just to hear her again, just to feel her lips on my skin again. I've never felt this way about anyone before. I didn't know how much I could take. It was probably the afternoon there, so I thought I'd try and call her. She forwarded me to voicemail. It actually upset me that she doesn't want to talk to me. Before I left her she said "don't hesitate to call me." Look how that worked out.

It was already late here and I had been invited to a party, so I might as well just go and at least try to have some fun. I walked through the streets of where I grew up, remembering all the chaotic stuff me and the guys did. I missed being younger where I didn't have a care in the world, and girls weren't an issue.

As I got closer, I could hear the house music being blasted. I wasn't in the mood to party, but anything to take my mind off of her. I made my way tthrough the crowd and said hi to a few people. This was your typical 'I'm-old-enough-to-buy-alcohol" party. I grabbed a red plastic cup and filled it with vodka and orange juice, and made it to the backyard, where it was a little less crowded.

"Is that Matthew?" I heard someone yell in an obnoxious tone, "oh my god, hello there. Wow, you grew up huh." It was some girl I used to go to school with who always got her way with guys.

"Yeah, hey. Nice to see you," I lied.

"You here alone? No girl?" She asks, taking a sip of whatever she was drinking.

"George invited me, I said hi to him earlier and came back here to relax a bit." I said, hoping she'd get the idea I wanted to be alone.

"Well, it's freezing out here, I'm going back inside. If you want to, whatever, you know where to find me." I nodded, not at all interested and she finally walked away.

I sat up against a wall and pulled out my phone. I turned it back on and saw that I had a missed call. My heart started to pound when I saw Alex's name on the screen. I quickly tapped to call her and hope she would answer. It rang a few times until she finally picked up.

"Hey," she sighed and sounded a bit nervous.

"You finally picked up," I said, smiling.

"Yeah, I finally got the nerve to press answer."

"Well I'm glad you answered." I'll admit this is a bit awkward, neither of us knew what to say.

"I think I should probably now," she said, sounding a little rushed.

"Wait, no. Please just talk to me," I said, sounding desperate. I wanted to talk to her more than anything, I just didn't know what to say.

"Matty," she sighs, "um, how are you?" She says a little awkwardly, but I could tell she was trying.

"I'm okay, I've been better. And you?"

"I'm getting better. Things went a little rough after you left, to be honest."

"Really, how?"

"I don't know, I felt alone. I felt like I didn't have anyone else to run to. I guess I just miss you." I couldn't help but smile.

"I miss you too, more than anything. I just-" I was cut off by someone yelling my name.

"MATTY GET INSIDE BEFORE YOU FREEZE." It was the same girl from earlier, I didn't remember her name.

"Looks like you have company?" Alex asks.

"No, I'm at a party. Not drunk, I swear. I'm outside and it's like the middle of the night here."

"Well you should probably get back then, right? I have some stuff to do anyway," she says.

"I lo-"

"I'll talk to you soon, I guess." She says, then hanging up. That wasn't exactly the conversation I had in mind, but I'll take it. She probably thinks I'm here with someone. I'd hate to think she's already trying to get over me. But that was probably the case.

I downed the vodka and orange juice mixture and headed back in. As soo. As I walked in, the same girl from earlier tried calling me over, but I continued walking past everyone. I just wanted to leave. The party was already dying out. There were two passed out drunks on the couch, the people making out in several corners, the girls wanting to get laid all lazily dancing in the middle of the room and me, the one who didn't give a fuck about this party.

I remember when I was in high school, i partied like it was the last day on earth. I'd do reckless shit and not even care about the consequences. Now, I'd rather be anywhere else but here. I can't do anything anymore without worrying about everything. Just as I was leaving I heard George yell out for me.

"Matty! Where you going? Can't leave yet, I've only just brought out the party favors." He says, waving a small plastic bag at me.

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I woke up the next morning with my head pounding. I didn't even have much to drink. I didn't even remember what happened last night. Or how I even got here. Must've been fucked up pretty bad.

It already was the afternoon and I was late for a recording session. I decided just to call in sick. A mild hangover and thoughts about Alex is a recipe for disaster. It was probably night time there so I decided against calling her. I think when she broke up with me, she essentially meant she didn't want anything to do with me.

That was conflicting me. Is she already in the process of moving on? I can't and won't move on. She means too much to me. She wasn't just a girlfriend to me. She was also my best friend. She was stupid too, but I love her. She went from cute girl who walked into the record shop, to someone I don't think I could live without. From the night I met her, I knew. I just did.

I don't even care if we don't ever date. I just need her. I mean, yeah I want to be able to hold her and call her mine, but if that isn't what she wants there's nothing I can do about it. I'd be happy if she just talked to me. Talked to me about anything. The last phone call we had was short and didn't go anywhere. I want to talk to her for hours until one of us falls asleep or something.

I missed her too, and that killed me. Not being able to see her smile killed me, especially not being the reason for her smile. I didn't know how she was doing. Knowing her, she's probably trying to convince everyone including herself that she's okay. I think it'd be best if I, too, try and be ok.

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****okay I'm sorry this was a horrible chapter. I tried..

Matty POVs are a bit harder than Alex's. But I'll think about doing more of them :)
Even if I were to stay on Alex's POV, Matty would still be here. It's not like I totally cut him out of the story.

But yeah :)

AND I'd like to say thanks for 60k reads!! Holy shit, I didn't even expect this to get more than a hundred reads when i first started. So thank you to everyone that reads, votes and comments!

Ps, I love replying to comments so leave some!