Fix You ~Completed~

Act Twenty-Two

"So, so beautiful."

"Kyla-"

"You are just so beautiful, Clem. You have no idea!"

"Kyla-"

"Oh god, you are the greatest baker the world has ever known! Clem, how on earth can you make such perfect angel food cake?" Kyla groaned loudly, tossing his head back while he shoveled forkfuls of the fluffy cake into his mouth. I watched with wide eyes. It was hard for me not to feel pleased by his reaction. Kyla was saying things I only dreamed of hearing from him.

And he was cuddling me. We were on the couch, me half on his lap while he had his right arm hooked around my shoulders. I was so caught up in all my happiness- all Kyla's happiness- that I didn't even realize how much cake I myself had eaten until I was nearly bursting at the seams. I could feel my stomach getting poofy beneath the warm fabric of my new hoodie. (Kyla hadn't commented on my new clothes yet. I wondered if he was curious where it came from.)

I laid my hand flat against my stomach, surprised at how soft it felt at the moment. "I am so... so full," I admitted in shock, tracing little circles over my hoodie. It was the blue one, not the one exclaimed I was the world's greatest effing friend. (I had a feeling Ale had picked this one out; it simply didn't seem like something Eddie would choose for me.)

"Never heard that come out of your mouth before," Kyla chuckled, nuzzling me. I giggled, admitting he hadn't. "Happy you're eating. I can't remember the last time I saw you eat."

"I eat," I whispered, staring down at my lap. "I just don't eat a lot."

"But you told me you have an eating disorder? Have you changed your mind?" If Kyla didn't sound so dreamy, I'd be offended by this. I probably would want to start crying, but I didn't feel anything negative.

In fact, I felt great. "You're worried about me?" I asked, my voice light. He remembered that conversation? He remembered my being afraid and thinking about EDs and...

Did he remember how he tried to help me? How he made me eat that whole banana and reminded me of how much he loved me afterwards? Sure, his wording was a little weird and it made me feel sort of bad for a while, but once I realized what he was getting at, I felt relieved. He was just making sure I knew how much I meant to him and reassuring himself he still meant as much to me.

"It's hard not to. You're so high maintenance," he sighed, lifting his arm off of me as he stood to get more cake.

I bit my lip to repress my smile. "But you love that, right?"

It was what he said the day I fell in love with him. I was high maintenance, but he loved that about me.

Kyla didn't respond at first. He got his cake and then returned to the couch. "I do love you," he said quietly, remaining a few inches away from me.

Usually, I'd never do what I did next, but nothing about that night fit into our usual life. I jumped on top of him, lifting the plate of cake right from his hands, and connected our lips ferociously. Kyla let out a muffled grunt, but he didn't shove me off.

"I love you," I panted against his mouth, taking his face in my hands. "Kyla, you're everything to me and I love you more than I love literally anything in this whole damn world."

"I know," he assured me, fisting my hoodie. "You never let me forget it."

I was laughing while I kissed him, desperate for more of his sugary words. "You make me so happy."

"Clem." He stroked the skin on my hip, carefully drawing his hands up and along my sides until he was at my arms. I let him lower mine down from his shoulders and he started rolling up my sleeves. "Don't lie to me. I don't make you happy. Nothing does."

"You do," I promised quietly, going in for more kisses. "You're all I need, Kyla. You and your kisses and your unconditional love and your laugh and-"

"Antidepressants, probably."

"No. No, just you. I just need you," I assured him, watching him place a whole village of kisses along my arms. I leaned closer, setting my head against his shoulder to watch. "Do you need me?" I asked, my voice low.

I wasn't sure why I expected a better answer. Maybe it was Kyla's mood that night, or maybe it was how gentle he was caressing me and kissing me. It was distorting my view of reality.

"What I need is some more," he mumbled, pulling back from me. He produced the baggy from earlier out of his pocket. "I'll be back in a second. I can already feel myself plummeting."

I curled up on the couch, watching him leave, both of my warped arms on display for absolutely no one. "Can I pretend you said yes?" I called after him. Kyla gave me no response. "I'll just pretend you said yes, okay? Kyla?"

I didn't see him for the rest of the night.