I'm still not 100% sure when I'm going to be back but I had this urge to write at like 4am this morning and this is what happened. I may be updating irregularly whenever I feel like writing until I fully sort everything out with life but anyway I hope you enjoy this.
‘Hey, can we talk for a little bit?’ Demi asks softly as she makes her way into her fourteen-year-old daughter’s bedroom and sits down on the edge of the bed.
‘I guess.’ Charlotte replies quietly.
‘I want to start by saying I love you and I will love you no matter what, Lottie. I also want you to know that I’m here for you.’ Demi says and Charlotte nods her head.
‘I’ve noticed some things over the past few weeks which have left me quite concerned and I may be completely wrong but I need to ask you about it… You’ve started dressing differently and that isn’t necessarily a bad thing but combined with the fact that I’ve noticed you’re eating smaller portions at dinner time leads me to believe there might be something else going on. Is there something else going on?’ Demi asks as Charlotte glances down at her hands.
‘I don’t know what to do, mom.’ Charlotte almost whispers and Demi moves until she’s sitting beside the teenager with her arm wrapped around her.
‘Why don’t you talk to me? Tell me how you’re feeling? I’ve been through this myself.’ Demi says and Charlotte takesa deep breath.
‘I just- I don’t know how this happened. I see all these pretty girls on Instagram and I just want to look like that.’Charlotte admits.
‘You are perfect just the way you are, Lottie. I remember being that girl looking at supermodels in magazines, looking at celebrities and thinking I had to look at that but I don’t and neither do you.’ Demi says kissing the top of Charlotte’s head as tears fill her eyes.
‘I didn’t know how to tell you.’ Charlotte replies resting her head against Demi.
‘I know it’s hard. Remember when I went back to treatment after having Hallie? I really struggled to tell your dad that I was having problems again. I really struggled to admit to you and Alfie what had gone on in my past. I spent years hiding from nana what I was doing and even when people confronted me I denied it so I’m glad you’re opening up to me.’ Demi says.
‘What do I do now?’ Charlotte asks.
‘I think you’d really benefit from getting some help and I don’t necessarily mean treatment like I get. Maybe we could set you up with a therapist to start off with and see what happens?’ Demi suggests and Charlotte nods her head.
‘Can you tell me how long this has been going on for?’ Demi asks.
‘A year, maybe more.’ Charlotte admits.
‘Oh sweetheart.’ Demi says holding Charlotte a little bit tighter.
****
It’s a little after 3am when Demi finally climbs out of Charlotte’s bed. Adjusting the covers so they’re covering the sleeping teenager, she sighs and leans down to kiss the top of her head.
‘I love you, beautiful girl. Demi whispers running her hand over the girl’s deep brunette hair before quietly leaves the room. Closing the door behind her she carefully makes her way down the landing peeking in each of her other four children’s doors to double-check they’re sleeping. Finally she reaches the master bedroom and makes her way inside where she finds Wilmer sitting in bed, the light from the bedside lamp dimly lighting the room and a book lying on his lap.
‘I thought you’d be sleep.’ She says reaching up to wipe her cheeks as she makes her way into the bedroom.
‘And I thought you might need a cuddle.’ He replies closing the book and placing it in the drawer of the bedside table.
‘I’ve never hated the fact that she’s such a mini-me until this moment. Until sitting beside her on that bed and seeing so much pain, so much of what I went through.’ She admits covering her face with her hands.
‘Hey, come here…’ Wilmer says softly as he gets out of bed and makes his way over to her. She slowly makes her wayinto his arms and rests her head against his chest as he gently rubs her back.
‘She’s going to get through this. Do you know how I know that? Because she is your mini-me and she is as strong asyou are.’ He says.
‘What if this happens again with Ada and Hallie?’ She asks and he pulls back slightly to wipe her cheeks.
‘Then we’ll get them through that as well. Whatever happens we are strong enough to get through this, I promise.’ He says.
'It's my fault. I should have been more open with them from the start. I've hid every struggle from them and now look what has happened.' Demi says shaking her head.
'You were trying to protect them, Dems. It's not your fault, none of this is your fault. She opened up to you didn't she?' Wilmer replies.
________
Making her way into the kitchen, Demi sighs as she keeps one-year-old Hallie balanced on her hip. She watches Charlotte push some eggs around her plate and glance up at Wilmer who smiles sympathetically.
'Breakfast, nena?' Wilmer asks causing Charlotte to glance over her shoulder at her mom.
'Mmm...' Demi replies quietly. Placing Hallie in her highchair, Demi watches as Wilmer scoops some eggs onto a plate and places it down across from Charlotte before kissing the top of Demi's head. Sitting down opposite her daughter, Demi can see the fear and desperation on Charlotte's face.
'I struggle as well, sweetheart. Shall we do this together?' Demi asks softly and Charlotte nods her head as a tear fall down her cheek.
________
Day by day, week by week and month by month things get better. Charlotte begins seeing a therapist and slowly starts to put weight back on until she reaches a healthy weight for her height. It's a struggle at times but slowly the entire family learns to adjust to their new normal.
