"You do this every time." Negan sighed. He slipped off his glove and dropped it onto the table beside his bed. "You're like a bratty teenage girl-"
"That's your type so I guess it works out." Carl replied. He stood next to the door, watching Negan. "I'm so sick of this bullshit. You always pull that 'you're so much better than them, I love you more' crap and then as soon as they walk in you're a different asshole."
"I think you mean person." Nega walked around the bed, dragging his fingers along the sheets. "And its not bullshit. You are different than them. We act differently than I act with them." Negan leaned against the frame of the bed. "For example, if they killed my men or threw little bitch fits every time I didn't do as they say, I would kick them out. But for some reason I keep you. Now... why is that?"
Carl scoffed. "You're a dick. I'm over this. I'm over your fake ass bullshit and the way you expect me to take shit like everyone else. I'm not one of your little toys who wears tiny black dresses and heels-"
"I would not mind it though." Negan smiled and tilted his head to the side. "You got real good legs. I could call you my little princess and show you off to all of my people-"
"Now isn't the time for your stupid sexual fantasies!" Carl snapped. "You picked me because I don't take bullshit. Stop being surprised when I get upset about it. You signed up for me and all of my-"
"Teen angst bullshit?" Negan took a step forward, then another, and another. "Darling... I love it. I love all the anger you got packed in that sweet little body of yours. I love how you never shut up no matter how bad I want you to. I love all of it, even that bad ass hole in your face-"
Carl ducked down, looking at his feet. His bangs fell over his face, hiding him from Negan, who was standing only inches away from him. "I know but-"
"But." Negan pressed his finger underneath Carls chin, raising his head up. "I have a way I do things. I will not leave my women. I will not change the way I speak to them. And I sure as hell will not let your jealousy issues run my relationships." Negan leaned down to kiss him. "You signed up for me the exact same way I signed up for you. So don't be bratty. It won't get you nothing but a spanking."
Carl jerked away from his hand, looking up at him. "Fine. Keep your stupid wives. I know they're only there for a quick fuck and a ego boost when you need it." He took a step back, looking Negan and up and down. "Its done. Whatever this was. It's done. I'm tired of watching you be with them as if I don't exist-"
"But you're totally okay with me being with you and pretending they don't exist?" Negan stepped towards him again, his grin looked more like a snarl. Carl stomped on every single one of Negans nerves. He was lucky that Negan was a sucker for pain. "You can't get it both ways. And you know the rules, kid. What happens when you aren't around is-"
"None of your business." Carl finished the statement, his glare sharpening. "But what if I am there? What if I get drug into that stupid room and have to watch you lay a hand on each and every one of those bitches?"
"Oh." Negan chuckled. "They're bitches now. That's a real bad word for someone your age. Do you really think you can be saying it? To me, especially?"
"You aren't my fucking dad." Carl hissed. "Stop acting like I'm out of line. If I got with another boy you would bash his god damn skull in. But I have to sit back and watch you kiss and touch all of them? And not be mad?" He shook his head. "You can't have it both ways." His eye flicked up and looked at Negan before he smirked.
Negan was silent, studying Carl. The way he stood. The way his eye would glance around the room before landing back down on Negan. Carl was different in a million and one ways. He was dangerous and messed up and hard, but it was also soft and kind and giving. But the thing that set Carl apart from the rest of Negans people was that Carl knew how to shut Negan up. And Negan fucking loved it.
"Baby girl.." Negan leaned down and kissed Carls neck, pulling Carl against him. "Don't be like that. You know I don't just use you." He pressed a kiss underneath Carls neck. "You're my favorite little wife."
"Shut up." Carl pushed his face away. "I'm not your friggin' wife either." He tangled his hand in Negans hair, pulling it ever so slightly. "You aren't my husband."
"What a shame." Negan kissed along his jaw, teeth grazing the skin, the scruff from his beer scratching at Carls neck. "I'd buy you pretty things. Rings and shit. All that girly stuff that you refuse to admit you like. But I can read you, kid. You look at those pretty diamonds my girls wear. You want them so bad."
Carl turned his head away. "I don't want stupid shiny rocks. I want you to stop being a dick with double standards." His shaking slim fingers curled around Negans leather jacket, dragging his nails across it.
"Its only fair that I buy my favorite wife one, right?" Negan pecked his lips, looking down at him. "But you don't want bracelets or necklaces like they got. You want rings. Like I'm proposing." He pressed their foreheads together. "You want me to be your husband and you wanna be my good little housewife. Doing the cooking and the cleaning. Taking care of me."
"I do not!" Carl shouted. The edge in his voice was gone. He was more ashamed than angry. Negan adored it, though. That the shithole of a world scraped up Carl Grimes. Broken, crooked, and falling apart. "I'm not like that! I'm not a girl! I'm not-"
Negan kissed him, hard. Carl gasped into his kiss, falling back against the wooden door. The door shook in place and Carl gripped Negan, pulling him closer. Negan nipped and sucked at Carls lips, teasing his tongue between them every few seconds.
Carl panted against his lips, ducking away to breathe. "Not your wife." He looked up at Negan, licking his lips. "Not. Your. Wife."
Negan smiled, rubbing his knuckles along Carls cheek. "I was kissing you to shut you up."
"You should know better than that." Carl tilted his head to the side and looked up at Negan. "You can't shut me up like that." He crossed his arms and looked away.
Negan licked his lips and reached for his belt, undoing it. "I think I know a way that can shut you up for a little while.."
