He Calls Me Harmony

Chapter twenty six: Ave Maria & You

Marriage is sacred. It binds one soul to another. It is an illustrious bud transformed into an iridescent flower. When I think of Joya's and I budding romance, I began to divulge myself into a world of fantasy. I gain a bit of my future every time I glance into those beautifully almond glossed eyes of hers. At her call I hear harp's, maybe even the angel's above sing. But as our love grows, the complications of conjoining two lives to make them one grows as well.

Ever since Joya agreed to becoming my fiance, my mind has not been able to concentrate on anything other than her. My heart skips a beat at the very thought of her. It has reached the point where I can no longer focus on my studies. Joya has become a strenuous amenity of my life. I frantically expressed this to my mother. With a small giggle and a moment of silence, she answered my question in her infamous nurturing tone: "My dear boy, You are experiencing your first love. You are head over heels Michael. Accept it...but remember..do not loose your goals or who you are my dear boy....I love you.", I constantly remind myself of my mother's wise word's. It is evident that it will take some mental refreshers before I am capable of containing my thoughts and emotions; that pertain to Joya for the most part. I sorted through my life from Gary until California and found that I have done so much and accomplished just as much. I never stop and reward myself. I know the cliche of rewards in being achieving success, but I feel my reward is past that contention. I am still pondering on the lost reward I so anxiously await for. Maybe it is happiness? Who knows? I continue starring into a wall lost in my recent thoughts. "Michael... Are you okay dear? ", I kindly voice asked tapping my shoulder. I slowly shift in my chair to glance at the owner of the question. It was Miss Ellen; the librarian. She is a middle age woman with short dark brown hair that sits on her shoulder's, she has ivory skin covered with sun spots,she also stands at five feet. She flashes her infamous warm smile at me as she awaited my answer. I finally nod before replying. "Yes Miss Ellen...I am fine. I was just thinking... ", Her smile minimizes being replaced with a look of interest. "Mind telling me?", She asked sweetly pulling out a share. I shake my head. "No I do not mind. Maybe you can help.", She sits in the chair and nods for me to continue. I sigh before beginning. "Well first, not too long ago my girlfriend accepted my proposal of marriage... ", I trailed off pausing to see if she was still being attentive. Miss Ellen smiles still nodding along my word's. I bite at my bottom lip and continue. "When she finally said Yes...I felt on top of the world... because she is my first love...", I trailed off feeling myself drifting from the conversation. "She seems like a great girl. I can tell you are most definitely in love. But what is the problem? Cold feet?", I glance at her awkwardly for a moment. I was not expecting that question. I know it is evident they most still have the mentality of which the ordinary is the right way to live, and those who do not live ordinarily have some negative agenda as they're reason for living outside of the ordinary. I guess my proposal to Joya is not ordinary for someone of my age. I finally inhale an answer. "No it is not that at all. It is my morals... They have changed along with my focus since the proposal. My mother...She constantly reminds me to not let my decision affect too much of my life. Especially my religion. ", I exhaled. She continues her nodding then smiles. "What is your religion? ", "Jehovah witness. ", I answered fiddling with my finger's. I usually don't share my religious views with other's. It is too sentimental for me. "Well have you done anything against your religion to make your mother so sensitive to your decisions? ", Her smile long left her face once the question slipped from her lips. I feel my palms become sweaty. I do not know if I should share with her my intimate sin on my religion. Her pupil's widen as she patiently awaits my answer. "Yes, I-I have. I think it is the worst one.", I finally answered biting at my bottom lip again. "What was it?", She asked, her tone filled with concern. "Monogamy... ", I whispered shamefully. Her facial expression does not change. After a moment of silence she places a gentle hand on mine. "Michael, I understand your mother's viewpoint, Monogamy before marriage is a huge sin in many religion's. But I will say this, one mistake does not mean you should be put on sinner watch. No offense to your mother. Tell me Michael, what do you think?", I glance around the library hoping an answer would come. Finally my heart commands me to just speak, don't think about it. I glance back at Miss Ellen. "I think I am over thinking thing's. But when it comes to my religion I do not want to let my family down nor do I want to let down God. I will admit I am scared that my family second guesses Joya's and I relationship because she is not a Jehovah witness, but I am even more afraid that they are going to push her into converting. Because of these thing's worrying me, I find it hard to focus on other thing's. ", I explained in a mouthful. The entire time I talked I felt the burdens of those thoughts leave my crowded mind. "I think that maybe you should talk to her and then your family. Let them know your feelings. You are bottling them up, that is not good Michael. ", I nod in agreement. She stands up. "Life is full of complications. Some we can handle other's we cannot. My final word to you Michael is, communication. It may give you all the answers you need...just try it.", I grab my books and mirror her. "Thank-you Miss Ellen, sorry to take up your time..", She laughs and smiles. "It is okay dear...You just needed an ear. Now I must go but remember my word's Michael... ", She enthused disappearing behind a nearby bookshelf. I stand there a little longer ponder. Communication.

Since having that talk with Miss Ellen, I decided to turn her word's into my action's. Today I invited Joya to a local Jehovah witness meeting. I know it is a bit bold but I do want her to experience a part of my life that is sacred to me. There are many repercussions that can occur with my invitation; Joya could feel pressured into converting is the one I am most worried about. I decided to make it easier for her by agreeing to drive her to the nearby church where the meeting is being held. I know it is not much but I think it is serving as a sign of support from my end. I slowly pull into the parking lot of the Kingdom Hall. When I switch the engine off I glance over at Joya. She is nervously staring at the front doors of the church. I steal her right hand where her engagement ring sits beautifully  from her lap. She shifts her gaze on me. I give her a small reassuring smile. "I want you to know this visit.. has no hidden agenda behind it. I just want you to experience a piece of my world.", She nods. "I know Michael. I am very honoured that you want me to do this with you, I am.", My smile widens. "Thank-you babygirl. We can go in any time you are ready, okay? ", She takes in a deep breath and nods. "I am ready.", She exhales and smiles. "Alright let us venture into a world you have never seen before! ", I enthused trying to lighten the mood. Joya giggles as she climbs out of the truck. I chuckle and do the same. "Michael stop kidding around I think we are late.", Joya playfully scolded taking my hand. I nod trying to hold back my laughs. "Okay, let's go.", I finally said after gathering myself. When we reach the front door's of the church Joya I feel Joya tense up. I open my mouth to comfort her but a member of the church walks up to us. "Hello brother and sister, Thank-you for coming on this beautiful day. God bless", He said greeting us warmly. Joya and I return his salutation with a smile and hug. "Nice people.. ", Joya whispered as we entered the heart of the church. "I told you. Nothing to worry about. ", I enthused squeezing her hand gently. We stop in our track's once we saw the member's of the church (and other's ), in the middle of silent worship. "What are they doing? ", Joya whispered taking a seat farthest from the alter. I sit beside her. "Praying and worshiping...", "Worshipping God right?", I nod. "And Abraham... just like Christians we Jehovah witness pray and worship God but also we pray to God's profit, father Abraham. ", I whispered now getting on my knee's. Joya furrows her eyebrows in confusion. "Is that not idolization in your religion? ", I Shake my head. "It is just thanking him for being a profit of God. Just like with Mary or Maria. ", I explained still whispering. "Wow so you just thank them?", I nod. "Just Ave Maria or Mary and you.", She glances around at the other congregates in awe. "This is a beautiful religion, Thank-you Michael. ", She whispered now kneeling on her knee's. It was my turn to give her a look of confusion. She giggles quietly. "May I pray with you?", She asks timidly.  I am smiling from ear to ear right now. "Of course babygirl.", Her smile widens As she bows her head. I do the same. I do not need to pray because at this moment all of my past prayers have been answered...

To Be Continued...