Home Is Your Heartbeat ('Home Is' Book Two - Daryl Dixon)

Chapter 10 - Goodbye Blue Sky (Pink Floyd)

DARYL

Rick scraped leaves off the sign that'd fallen on the ground.

Terminus.

"Getting close, we'll be there before sundown."

I squint up the track with my one good eye as the other is still swollen shut. Haven't taken a beatin like that in a long time.

I'm feeling every minute of my age today. But now that I've got part of my family back?

It's starting to feel like I'm becoming normal again....and where I'm meant to be.

"We'll head through the woods and get a good look at them first"  Rick ordered.

Carl was walkin behind me. Could hear him sniffin....trying not to cry out loud. Hang back until I'm alongside him.

"I'm sorry, little man. About what that guy tried to do to yer, and that yer saw what yer Dad had to do to him. And Lil'....just real sorry is all"  I whisper softly.

"Not crying just because of that, Daryl. And I'm really happy you're back home now. Nothing felt right without you....like a big chunk of us was missing. You know?"

He squinted up at me, and I ain't seen so much pain on his face since his Momma died.

"It's just....this morning? I heard Dad ask you. About Nate. You didn't answer, but he started crying. And then, I guess I just knew."

Couldn't look at him, not after he said her name out loud. First time I've heard it in weeks.

But he kept talking as we walked.

"I loved her. Not exactly like you did, but....kinda different. And she loved me back, too. I know that cos she always kept telling me. Ever since the first day we met."

"She was my big sister, our  big sister. Nate loved us, and she kept me going on the inside. Cos she taught me. About my ten minutes."

"Ten minutes?"  Can't stop myself from askin.

Even though I feel like I'm dying....listenin to him talk about her.

"Nate said that you have  to take ten minutes every single day, just for yourself. To simply....be happy."

"No matter how bad things are around you or how guilty you might feel doing it? You just have to!  Cos ten minutes of being happy every day is enough to keep you going. Keep on doing what you need to."

"She told me, Daryl. That breathing keeps you living? But ten minutes is all it takes....to make you feel alive again."

"Nate said she had five of those minutes every single morning when she woke up. But the other five? I know that she gave them to me. Just let me be a dumb kid again, and didn't expect me to act like an adult."

"Would read and talk about comics with me, play swordfights, or we'd just run around. Yell and dance and laugh and act like total idiots. Or go head-to-head on the basketball court....that was one of my favourites."

"Just being really stupid and happy....though never  feeling silly for doing it. You saw it for yourself, too. So you know what I mean, Daryl"  I nod in acknowledgement.

"I've been saving all my five minutes for her, every day since we left the prison. Just like she gave up her five minutes to me. But I can't gift them back now, can I?"

Honestly don't know how to answer him. Not after hearing about the other five minutes.

Cos I now realise....that they're the ones that she gave away to me every day?