Herbs and Spices // snowbaz

hello again (also: baz being soft)

"At first you were just this kid, this annoying kid with a red ball that wouldn't leave me alone. The crucible had stuck me with you, this kid with an infectious and obnoxious amount of power, who seemed like he was ripping at the seams trying to get out of his own body - and then you weren't that anymore. I mean, you were, but you were more. I couldn't see past you anymore, Snow."

"I couldn't see past you anymore - even though I wanted to," Baz's eyes were wide as if he was surprised with the words that spilled out between his lips like syrup, warm and thick, sickly sweet.

"I knew I wasn't alone in this, this tunnel vision - maybe everyone that meets you can only see you - blame it on your magic if you want, I'm not so sure. The only thing I was sure of was the one person who couldn't see your enormity, your infectiousness was you, Snow."

Baz took a heaving breath, and Simon did too, even as he was unaware of his mirroring behaviour. Baz looked like he wanted to stop speaking, but he couldn't, a higher power than he was in charge of the words now. They flew from his mouth before he could even think to raise his hands to try and catch them and force them back down his throat (even though he'd been fighting these words for so long that letting them go was a weight off his shoulders.)

Baz gulped, eyes flickered around the room, not quite landing on Simon - until they did, a lightning bolt shooting down both their spines. Simon had his hands clasped in his lap, fingers locked in an embrace that was turning his knuckles white, the tips of his fingers red. Baz longed to untangle them, to put them between his own and squeeze colour back into them.

"I couldn't see past you anymore, you took up so much of my vision; a vision that had felt like there was a film obscuring it ever since my mother had died," a sharp, staggering breath, "I had been wandering. And then, you were there and you were a pain, a pest, an annoyance that I wanted out of my sight, but then, god Snow, you were everything. I couldn't see past you anymore."

Simon's hands weren't tangled anymore, not in his lap at least. Lips met lips in a burn so bright the room changed colour, and god if this wasn't what Baz had always wanted. 

***************

hello again, I kind of can't believe I'm back here, but I missed it and Baz and Simon and ahhh hello again! - alsooooo Herbs and Spices is ranked #11 in carry on stories??! which is mental!

I know it's only out of 70 something stories but likeeeeee having any ranking is mental to me! thank you so much to everyone who has ever read these stories, or ever will, and I promise I'm gonna be writing more, just whenever I feel like it xx

(also I know this is ridiculously short but I haven't written in a while and I'm coming back into it slowly but surely)