(COMPLETE) Please, don't try to fix me. - Book 1.

29.

Mitch's POV.

I snuggled closer to Scott as I let out soft sobs. This is my fault. He will never have sex with me, because I chose to have sex with Beau. I'm stupid.

"Baby? Do you sometimes think of how life would be after we get out of here?" Scott asked.

I looked up at him.

"Yes, why?" I whispered.

"Just asking. I don't have anywhere to live." Scott said.

"Me neither." I sighed.

"I would love to have a small apartment." Scott smiled.

"A small apartment is nice..." I smiled back.

"I want a puppy too." Scott said.

"Isn't a puppy too much work?" I asked.

"Not at all. It would also help me when I feel like shit. To prevent the cutting, you know..." Scott explained.

"Oh, yes. Very smart." I smiled as I pecked his lips.

"Thanks and we could walk together, that's a plus too." Scott smiled.

"Walk together?" I asked.

"Yes, the puppy would need lots of walks." Scott said.

"I don't get it? You're going to have a puppy. Not me." I said.

"Mitchy... I want to have an apartment together with you!" Scott laughed.

My eyes widened.

"D-Do you w-want to l-live together with me?" I stuttered in disbelief.

Scott cupped my cheeks to let me look into his eyes.

"Mitchy, of course I want to. I mean, it wouldn't be different than what we do here." Scott said.

"So you want to live together with me, because we already kinda are living together here?" I asked.

"No. I want to live together with you, because I love you." Scott smiled.

"If you love me, then why don't we have sex?" I whispered.

"Mitchy, you already know the answer to that. That I don't have sex with you, doesn't mean that I don't love you." Scott said.

I sighed. I love this man to bits. I pushed myself closer to him.

"I love you so much. I'm sorry for everything I've done. I've ruined everything." I said shakily.

"No, you didn't." Scott whispered.

Someone knocked on the door. Scott and I sat up.

I opened the door. I gasped softly. It was Beau. I haven't seen him since he got shot in his leg. Well, we didn't talk to each other and only said a simple 'hi' when we met each other in the hallway.

"H-Hi." I greeted.

"Hey..." Beau greeted back.

Silence.

"Mitchy? Who's that?" Scott asked.

"Umm. It's Beau, sweatheart." I answered.

Scott stood up and walked to the door.

"Hey Scott, Kevin has sent me to tell you that visit time is over." Beau said.

"Oh. Yeah, thanks for telling me. Well, I'll see you later, baby." Scott said as he kissed me softly.

I kissed him back and smiled into the kiss. I knew he did this in front of Beau on purpose. I knew he was scared of me having sex with Beau again.

"Yes. I see you later, hon." I said as I pulled back.

Scott gave me THE look and I nodded at him with a smile to assure him that everything will be okay.

"So, come in." I said to Beau as Scott walked away.

"Thanks." Beau said as he walked in.

I closed the door behind him.

So, how's your leg?" I asked.

"Fine. I can walk as you see." Beau smiled.

"Yes, I can see that." I giggled.

Damn, this is awkward.

"Mitch... I also came here to tell you that I'm leaving tomorrow." Beau sighed.

"W-What? That's a short stay." I said.

I couldn't help the feeling to be slightly disappointed.

"Yes. It wasn't that serious. But I just wanted to visit you before I leave. I know our last conversation didn't go well and the last time I was here was quite a disaster." Beau told me.

"Yeah. It was..." I smiled.

"I just wanna tell you that I don't regret anything. I don't regret having sex with you and losing my virginity to you. I even don't regret that I love you, because I really do." Beau said.

"Beau..." I sighed.

"No, save it. I know that you don't love me back and that's okay. I just wanted to say it." Beau smiled.

"Thank you for being so honest with me. I appreciate it. You're a really sweet boy. I'm gonna miss you." I smiled.

I walked to Beau and gave him a hug. Beau's body tensed. I pulled back.

"S-Sorry... I had to do that." I said.

"Thank you, let's do it again. Better this time." Beau said as he hugged me again.

I felt myself melt into his arms.

Stop it, stupid. You have a boyfriend.

I pulled back from the hug and smiled at Beau.

"Yeah. So, I think I'm not going to see you again..." Beau said softly.

I could see Beau struggle with his emotions. I held his hand and decided to kiss his cheek sweetly.

"We'll meet again. I know we will. But for now, good luck. You will find a boy who's cuter than me." I said.

"Not possible." Beau whispered.

"Believe me, it is." I laughed.

Beau smiled at me and gave me one last hug.

"Goodbye, Mitch." Beau said.

"Goodbye..." I whispered as Beau walked out of my room.

I couldn't place my emotions. I sat on my bed and finally let the tears stream down my face.