Una vez tuve un amigo que se sintió de verdad. Un amigo que creí entender, conocer y quise mucho. Después el tiempo me mostró lo contrario, me hizo descubrir que una vez más, quise una idea y no una persona. Escribí este cuento para él, que después se transformó en una obra de Ballet en Ámsterdam. Para ustedes será algo así como un último cuento en inglés pero para mí suena a clausura, se lee en emoción y se siente justicia.
'It's dark...it's cold.
It's a world out there'
Maybe that's why she felt that way. She could feel the pain of being exposed that way as he made his way through the mist void. Every step she took felt undue, every thought was perilous. Even breathing was risky; every touch she shared with the harsh air was reckless.
She reached the spot of light and as her toes touched the perfect circle, the whispers started to rage on her mind. It felt relieving you know...to lighten the weight of letting them hear what she had inside. Nothing changed but now they knew. They could even see it. It was that sigh of ease that let her feel free at once, the same one that impulse them four to get out of her body.
While they made their way out of her body, she could feel the painful satisfaction of allowing herself to be authentic. They awaited in the darkness with their heads down while she lied on the floor. She was asleep.
Sanguine came out over her first. A star lighted up while Sanguine stepped forward to own the light and her charm soon got everyone hooked. The glamor, its lure...everything was delightful. It was when it started to be aware of the joy it could feel while stretching its arms up to the light, when Choleric grabbed them. Another star lightened up in the sky. This made her wake up; she got hypnotized by the way Sanguine and Choleric moved together. She didn't realize before but now she knew she had a name of her own...Melancholic. She started to be aware of herself as Choleric leaded Sanguine through their movements. The firmness and security with which he developed soon made them look like one and Melancholic started to realize she admired them. Suddenly, Choleric released Sanguine's hands. Sanguine felt rejected while Choleric stole their eyes from her. Now he was the center of attention, again. Sanguine was still motivated to steal the show from him by imitating his moves but even their synchronicity lasted less than an instant, he managed to do something new and different overtime. Sanguine walked with defeat and sat next to Melancholic as flamboyant Choleric cached everyone's attention. Out of the blue, Supine appeared. Another star appeared up in the sky. All this time she was watching silently. Everyone looked back at Supine as she turned around and gazed with admiration the bum of light. Her moves where different, she pleased everyone with grace. She smiled back at them and looked at everyone with wit and charm. Her movements made them get lost in her and Choleric's frustration of accepting the rout, made him sit next to the other two feeling nothing but retained failure. Phlegmatic appeared with his head down, feeling down and weak from the opposite side of the bum of light. A light appeared up in the sky, another star. Without even watching around, he did his own moves. Very silent and attracted to the ground that made him feel safe. Supine noticed that everyone was watching Phlegmatic instead of her. This made her try even harder to reach that point of softness and charm that made everyone like her but now...it wasn't there anymore because fear took over her. She felt she wasn't enough, now Phlegmatic's decay was the center of attention. Supine left that place and sat next to the other three, but as she sat, Melancholic stood up with fear. Her place wasn't her place any more, she needed to find comfort somewhere else and she knew it wasn't there with the others. With her head down she followed her own body as movements made her elevate. Melancholic and Phlegmatic weren't aware about this, but their shared gloomy and doleful made their movements synchronized. Their eyes closed made them feel comfortable inside themselves, not scared about what they could say or think because no one was there. Inside them selves there was nothing but the perfect solitude that made everything feel okay. Their movements grew overtime and soon Sanguine appeared next to them drifted by the same feeling. The three of them floated with their eyes closed, the way their bodies flowed following the same kind of sadness made everything feel perfectly still. Choleric appeared from the other side, the four of them where now synchronized. Moving softly and sharing the same loneliness, that's how the last of them, Supine got to join them.
'It's not clear yet is warm.
There's a world inside'
What was a simple movement, shifted into a perfect choreography. The five of them where enchained by the same kind of feeling even though they weren't aware of this...their eyes were still closed. While rounding into each other and starting to feel the contiguous bodies made them wake up, one by one.
They where suddenly aware of what was happening, but now the only way to feel connected was when they synchronized. The problem was that being awake meant being aware of the world as well. They tried so hard to work together and I swear, there where moments where they where just one single persona. This made them feel exhausted drained and it even hurt to get so close to each other. But it was worth it. The satisfaction of trying made every effort worth it. Soon they even started to see everything bleary, they where jaded.
The bum of light started growing. They continued to try to get together as they once were but their bodies felt nearly dead. That's how soon they started to turn off and so their stars did. They dropped dead over each other, one by one but the light continued to spread...all of a sudden Melancholic realized that not only she was the only one left but that all this time, they were watching. Now she could see all of their faces, watching back at her still from the other side. All this time...they were exposed and the five of them weren't aware of it. Maybe that's why they felt so good together; they even got to forget the world.
Her star was the last one to turn off, of course it was. She started everything but she didn't blame herself for that...that was back in the past. That's it, for once in her life she wasn't looking back in the past. Maybe that's why time stopped for her two...she wasn't supposed to feel the ease to sharing her sadness with others.
Who would have said that feelings, perfectly misplaced, would create out of death something beautiful?
