Lookism X Reader

Jay x Fem. Reader

Request for @Coralial
Note: Angsty, and Hanahaki Disease.  Choice ending.

~•🌺•~

Everyday was suffocatingly  hot.  (Name) felt burning in her lungs as the weeks went by and it only grew more intense.  It had been like that for a month already and it was moving into a second one.  She knew she was sick when she had first coughed up beautiful (flower) petals.

(Name) had gone the next day to find the person at the root of her illness.  She contracted hanahaki disease because of her long held love for the silent boy Jay Hong.  She went around school hoping to find him, but by the time she did regret had already pounded its way into her gut.  Her (eye color) eyes glossed over in tears of frustration.  She found Jay but there was no way she would ever get the cure she was looking for.  He was hidden behind one of the schools many cement pillars just like she was.

(Name) was ready to tell him.  She prepared herself to walk over the few feet separating them and tell him what she felt, but he coughed.  His eyes were still glued to whatever he was watching, completely undisturbed.

The world could have gone by just as it was, but the (color) petals that lay at Jay's feet wouldn't allow for it. (Name)'s heart squeezed well past the point at which it should have popped.  Her throat caught and her eyes stung like someone had just thrown salt straight into them.  She covered her mouth with her hand to keep quiet as she watched on.

Jay was focused.  It's unlikely he would have heard (Name) even if she hadn't had bothered to cover her mouth.  He was fixated on Daniel Park so much that he didn't bother to stifle the hacking up of flower petals.  Instead they fell freely.  Entire flowers.  The source of his own case of hanahaki disease obvious to it all.  As oblivious as Jay was to (Name)'s personal hell only mere steps away.

(Name) had run home crying the second she was able to tear away from the scene before her.

At home it felt like the flowers, no longer just petals, would never cease to flow from her mouth or muffle her screams of anguish.  One after another bushels of (flower)s fell onto her bathroom's cold floor.  She fell asleep when the exhaustion was too much.

That had been the worst day of her life.  (Name) didn't go to school for a few days following the incident.  She was sure she would die because of her illness.

Inevitably (Name) had to return to school.  She fought herself every step of the way there that it was necessary for her to go.  She both wanted to see Jay and knew she shouldn't.  She was caught between pushing her feelings for him away and wanting to lay it all bare for him despite the rejection she knew would follow.

She decided not to say anything.  She loved Jay.  Loved him enough to die if it meant he wouldn't.  She had seen his hanahaki disease.  She knew she couldn't hope to heal both him and herself when she had seen that, so she decided.  She would cure him.

(Name) began pushing Jay to take more steps towards showing Daniel he liked him.  She had always been Jay's unconditionally supportive friend.  She encouraged Jay in everything he did, and that put him closer to safety.

It still hurt to see Jay flirt and be awkward with Daniel although it was a good sign to (Name).  The pain from when she saw it never failed to summon the flowers and they'd reappear in her throat. She excused herself to cough them up, every time. She couldn't bare the thought of Jay seeing her.

Choose an Ending: A. Perish   B. Flourish

A.
     Her limited days felt like they were being dragged out slowly and made torturously long. The swelling of (Name)'s throat had only gotten worse. She soon found it impossible to breath, and succumbed. She had stayed in school all throughout suffering from her illness.  No one ever found out about it.  (Name) had kept it a complete secret so that there was never a chance for Jay to get the blame for it.

(Name) was able to hold out to see Jay flower free.  It made her heart swell with pride to know he would be okay without her.

B.
    Spending all her time to get Jay together with Daniel (Name) felt like time flew by. She was so focused everyday that she didn't notice the (flower) petals becoming less and less.  She didn't notice Jay's shifting interest from Daniel to her, or how he waited for her everyday by the school entrance.  It was clear for anybody else to see that they had grown closer, but (Name)'s brain couldn't put it together.  Jay had stopped trying to date Daniel and started trying to date her.  It was only when he popped the question that she was finally able to realize.