Smoke

1: Again

I woke up sometime around 3 am, coughing, gagging.
My throat felt blocked. I could feel a heat inside my body, a humidity. I couldn't breathe.

My coughs were rigid and gutteral and dry. My chest was tight, and I needed to sit up, to help clear my throat somehow, but I was frozen. The heat in my body was humid and burning. I could breathe it in.
Each cough released smoke. I could see it puffing out as the air left my body, could see it curl up as I choked.

I could hear mother storm up the stairs, each footstep like a pounding on my head, until she was in my room, talking loudly and nervously, trying to see what was happening.

I tried to talk, to tell her it was happening again, but all that came out was a wheezing.
She hit my back a few times, trying to move whatever was blocking my airways. Smoke puffed out of my body when she hit me, until it finally diminished and I could breathe.

My lungs were tired, my head was tired, I was tired.
I sat up, curling my body into a small sitting position while my mom rubbed my back.
"I'm sorry, sugar, but you have to transfer to my old school. You can't keep doing this, it's dangerous to your health." My Mom said quietly, pulling my hair back and out of my face. I nodded, my throat dry.

"Why can't I just get rid of it?" I asked, my voice scratchy and almost silent. She understood what I said, though, and purses her lips.

"Over time, you'll accept it. And you'll get better with it." She smiled softly.
"But I don't want to get better. I want it gone." I said, my voice tiny, curling into myself more.

"I'm sorry, sugar." She said. I nodded, regaining my breathing and composure. "You're not going to school today. We're going to sort everything out." She said as quietly as me. Getting up, she went back to her own room, walking through the dark. "Get some rest." She said, closing the door gently.

But I couldn't go back to bed. I never could, not since this whole 'powers' thing started.
It hasn't seemed like a power, more like a weakness, a flaw, and it was taking over my whole life.
I laid in bed, trying not to overthink or freak out about transferring, about my power, about any of it, but that's exactly what I did.