If I Lie : Book 2

1. My Heart Stays Here

Ashley POV

"Mom, mom, mom wake up!" I feel small and dainty fingers begin to squeeze my arm through the blanket. "mommy!" the monotone voice rings about in my ears causing me to scrunch my entire face but as the blaring voice of a child and just hearing the word "mommy" meant it was time for me to wake no matter what child I was facing. My world lit up again bright and early in the morning as I turned around to see a dirty blonde haired little girl with brown eyes, she had my pert and witchy little nose, god she was so beautiful-- the blush around her cheeks and little frame before me. 

My darling, my Virginia. "oh there you are, hello baby!" I opened my arms to her as she jumped ahead of me into them and closed her in them. I never wanted to let her go, ever and this warm little girl in my arms meant the world, meaning so much more than my mind could ever comprehend. She was all my heart and soul. 

"Hi mommy, I missed you so much!" she hugs me so tightly and peppers my face with kisses. I kissed her back. My joy, my light, and my life. 

I pulled her back and looked at her face with my brightest smile to her adorable face. "mommy missed you too baby, tell me where are the rest of your brothers and sisters?"

She held my hand and looked down at me with sincere eyes and her lips twitched upward in a small evil grin. "oh don't you remember mommy? Their all dead, I'm all you have." Virginia told me. She scared me, my own child scared me and I didn't know how I could come back from this. 

No I had three kids at home who I was blessed to have. They weren't dead, my babies weren't dead, they weren't gone. "take that back Virginia that's nothing to ever joke about!" 

She shook her head and pulled me from out of my bed. "no mommy look!" by now my daughter was dragging me to her sibling's bedroom and before me were all five of my children; ashened and decaying skin all with pale blue eyes as if the storm struck in them all. They were laid up with one another cuddling as if they fought the cold before death came, their mouths because of their screams. "see mom, their all dead." she pointed at her siblings.

I fell before them all in a bigger loss than I first did when I lose her. "what did you do!" I shook my daughter. "what the fuck did you do to them?!" I kept shaking the child I was hard to let go off in the beginning. The one I'd already lost, Virginia. "why did you do it!" I raised my hand to her in the mindset of only anger and pain. 

Then I remembered she died first, she was the dead one. "mommy don't hurt me please!" my little girl yelped. She raised her hand up to her face as my hand was set to collide into her gave. 

"You're dead." I tell her. "you are dead." I told her again, speaking more words apart this time and I keep repeating this over and over until it hits me and she disappears. I begin to wake up from this nightmare.

- - 

I felt a pair of large hands on me, shaking me awake. "baby, baby wake up!" I heard her voice sounding like bells in my ears. I couldn't get up just yet but she kept shaking me. "baby I need you to get up!" Eliza peppered my cheek with light slaps. I hated when she did that, I hated when she was even harder doing it in the playroom. But it's an effective way to get me up. 

I had tears about my eyes and couldn't stop sobbing once I started. I had seen my daughter all grown up, my daughter that died years ago and before she even came out of me and this wasn't unusual, this wasn't something that just happened. The same time every year just before their birthdays it gets like this, I think of her the most. "I'm s-s-sorry," I told her as I cried into her chest. She held me only tighter.