I'm a TRANnosaurus | Trans Guy Things Part 2

I don't get it, I'm not a girl |362|

I'm going to go on a rant here, so skip it if you want. Also, tigger warning, I'm gonna talk about anxiety, self-harm, depression, and suicide so if you are gonna struggle while reading it, please skip over this chapter too, thanks.

My sister just called me a girl, and said I'll never be a real boy and I feel even more invalidated. In the last week everyone in my family has said something that has been invalidatimg and it hurts. I cry, and have an anxiety attack when I get misgendered, or someone invalidates me because the dysphoria hurts that bad, and people keep telling me I'm faking, and keep invalidating me? Seriously?

Right. Having the worst anxiety attacks I've ever had when I get misgendered, or minsnamed is all an act. When I cry because I look in the mirror, a fucking act I guess. When I cut myself because my body is so wrong, and no one beleives me, I'm total acting. Everytime I've picked up something, like a bottle of pills, or a rope, or a knife, or something with the intent of suicide, that one is definitely an act. Yep. Totally.

I don't get it. I don't fucking get it at all. I'm not hurting anyone, so why the fuck do people intentionally hurt me?

Am I really that fucking bad of a person?