RETURN {the100} ✔️

25.

Once Bellamy and I had managed to separate ourselves from the others walking back towards camp, he stopped. He grabbed hold of my hands and began to untie the belt holding them together. I hadn't realized that they were still tied, but when he removed them I sighed peacefully and rubbed the sore skin.

He fumbled around with the belt in his hands for a moment before taking in a deep breath, he turned away from me and threw it as hard as he could. My eyes widen at the sudden aggression and I knew that he was obviously still mad about something.

"Hey," I said softly as I placed a hand on the back of his shoulder, I stepped around him so we were facing each other again, "what's wrong?"

"What's wrong," he copied my words in shock, he threw his hands into the air, "everything is wrong! This whole day has been wrong!"

I took in a deep breath and removed my hand from his shoulder; and said playfully as if trying to lighten the mood, "i mean we don't have to listen to Murphy's obnoxious voice anymore?"

He looked at me with judging eyes and I quickly said, "I'm joking! We can't dwell on every bad thing that happens down here."

"That's the thing," he said, "bad things keep happening!"

"Take you for example,-" Bellamy began before I cut him off.

"Me? What about me?"

"You almost died today," he said in all seriousness as he held up two fingers, "twice!"

"Yeah, but I didn't," I said as I waved his concern away.

"You could have though, all because of idiots!"

"But," I said slowly towards him to try and make him understand, "I. Didn't."

Taking in a deep breath, I ran my fingers through my hair and turned away from him for a moment before sighing, "Bellamy, I understand that you care, but I can take care of myself."

He laughed, "again, almost died twice today."

"Well you know what!" I yelled as my anger got the best of me, I took in a deep breath to calm myself before saying, "I'd do everything the exact same. If I die trying to protect others, than so be it! Murphy didn't deserve to be hung! Charlotte didn't deserve to die for a mistake! We can't always give the people what they want!"

"What's that supposed to mean," he asked offended.

"It wasn't me pushing the crate out from under him," I said as I took a step towards him.

He shook his head and turned and walked away from me. This just made me even more mad for some reason, "oh, so you're just running away now?"

"No!" He yelled as he turned around, "I'm walking away before one of us says something we will regret later."

My eyes widened for a moment and then I let out a shaky breath; I knew he was right, but at the moment I no longer cared. This whole conversation was turning pointless, I had tried to help him, to get him to open up to me and it seemed that I was just pushing him further away. My words had gone to far, I could admit that - to myself - but I didn't regret my words, because they were right.

Bellamy had been the one to push the crate out from under Murphy, he had been the one to give him power in the first place; Bellamy was just as much to blame for the events of today as Clarke and Charlotte were.

Looking away from him for a moment, I ran my hands threw my hair and than shoved them back into my pockets. I didn't know what say, part of me wanted everything to go back to the way it used be, but another part of me wanted him to trust me. To open up and confide his secrets to me, I mean would that be so bad? For the two of us to have someone, even if it were just to talk too?