RETURN {the100} ✔️

41.

It didn't take long for Octavia to start questioning me, she was hounding me for hours about everything. I tried my best to keep the situation with Bellamy to myself, but even I couldn't stand the introgation by her. She was tough, never once letting up; to most people, Octavia would have annoyed them, but it was nice - in a, tell me your feelings for my brother because we are friends, kind of way.

She was my friend, I considered her my best friend as of lately and Bellamy was her brother, if anyone understood him, it was her. It made sense to confess the constant turmoil going inside me, to tell her my inner thoughts about the boy. It was freeing, to finally get all my scattered thoughts out; as if speaken them aloud got them out of me.

The worst thoughts, my fears, about the situation we're still there. Somewhere hidden deep within the back of my mind, but I wasn't going to let Octavia know that. Nor did I mention Theo, that would have been a whole another issue. Though, I had to admit, I missed him. Alot.

I wasn't sure would I would stand now with Theo, after everything that had recently happened between our people and my being with Bellamy. Theo had made it clear that he had pushed for me to be with Bellamy, by forcing me to leave him when I had practically thrown myself at Theo. Yet, this was different now. Although, you probably couldn't see it, I was different now. At least, I felt differently. About Theo.. The potential war.. Bellamy..

It was all different now, the question to come, was it a good different or a bad one?

Sighing through my nose, I closed the book that Lincoln had left behind for Octavia. She kept it in her tent, close by at all times. Claiming that it made them always together, even when apart. When told me this, I had subconsciously reach for my neck, hoping to grab that neck lace that Theo had made me, but I only grabbed air.

I had completely forgotten that I had given it to Lincoln, to prove to Theo that I had been the one to help Lincoln escape, rather than the one whom had locked his friends away. I guess we all didn't exactly have time after that to get it back, Theo had disappeared and than the next time I had saw him was the morning of the bridge. Well, we know how well that had gone over.

"What is it," Octavia's concerned voice questioned me. She was leaning over the make shift bed, her tired eyes focused on my face, studying me.

"Uhm," I hesitated, debating on if now was the right moment to mention Theo and start up that potential conversation. A limb began to form in my throat, thinking about what he must have been doing at the moment. Had he gotten to Lincoln? What were his people thinking about him? However, norther of those questions were as great as a concern, what mainly plagued my mind was why had Lincoln told me not to trust Theo?

Swallowing me pride and the lump, I tore my gaze from the book and placed my hands back down on to the bed, " I was just thinking about Theo..."

Her eyes widened for a moment and than she sat up, moving closer towards me, "what about?"

My lungs pulled in a large amount of air as my mind tried to think of an answer to that question. There was so many things I could say, but I wasn't sure how to go about it. I wasn't entirely sure I knew what I was more concerned about, his possible betrayal or the fear of him feeling bitter about my sleeping with Bellamy.

"Just hope he is okay," I finally said before flopping onto my back and looking up towards the roof of the tent. It wasn't a complete lie of course,  I was worried about him. But that wasn't what I had been thinking about.

The sound of Octavia's tent was thrown open and than a worried looking Bellamy stepped in, he was hunched over and his knuckles were white as he gripped the branch, holding the tent together.