Dear you,

his entry no.15

20 October '2018

"Love is a four lettered word that I never learned"

Before all of this happened, I wasn't a big fan of music. I would wonder why people would say "oh I can relate to this song". Or how the songs could easily play with their emotions. With every lyric, pulling in the person even more. Well turns out... I do know how they feel. I keep on listening to the song 'all I want' by Kodaline, all the time. And especially relate at this part "if you loved me, why'd you leave me?"

Its been twenty six days since I last saw L. Selena told me the less I think about her, the faster I move on. In case if you have missed out on my last entry or somehow the page is missing, Selena is my new friend. And the thing that sets her apart from the rest is that... She's a stripper. We actually got really close during the past few days. Who knew?

Anyways, yesterday Selena called me and she told me her Uber was taking forever. I was coming back from fixing my grandma's internet (second time this week). So, I agreed to pick her up from the club and drop her off at her hostel.

"You wanna come inside?" She asked, while taking off her enormous earings. I wonder if her ears would hurt.

"Ummm I don't know"

"Come I'll show you around. Don't worry its safe"

"No I really have to head home", I didn't. I was just afraid what was going to be inside.

"Oh come on, I'll make coffee"

"Alright". I mean how worse could it be? She was my only friend after all.

Turns out it wasn't that bad. She had a small bed in the corner of her room. The walls were purple and she had posters of God knows what. A small couch with a tv in front of it. And a small kitchen with enough space for two people.

"Nice room", that's such a cliche thing for me to say

"Thanks. Wait here while I change". She did look nice before with thigh high boots and a shiny red dress. She changed into shorts and a graphic shirt saying "paste quote here".

"My legs are killing me. Piece of advice, don't ever wear high heels", she said while making coffee.

"Advice taken. So, what do you do in your free time?"

"I mean I don't hang around with friends. Because clearly, who'd want to. Except for you buddy, you're cool"

"I feel honored "

"You're such a cutie", she said while giving me my cup of coffee and sitting beside me.

"So whats your story?" I asked, keen on knowing.

"Story? I don't have one"

"Come on, everyone's got a story"

"Whats your's then?", she asked while I prepared my throat. I told her everything about what had happened and didn't try to miss a detail. How my mom had left when I was young, how my father was working hard to pay off loans and of course all about L.

"Don't worry. Everything happens for a reason, God always has a plan". As soon as she said those words I thought to myself, whether she was religious. But thought it would make things more awkward or it would offend her.

"Your turn" I said happily

"Well I never really had a family. I mean Elise (I'm assuming the club owner) told me that she found me all alone on the streets. And so she brought me home and raised me. I was raised in a house full of strippers. And when I was of age I was trained to do the same. I didn't have a chance to go to college like you or other kids our age. which landed me here, I didn't imagine this at all for me"

"So then what did you imagine for yourself?"

"Definitely not this. Having sex with total strangers is not the life I want. I wanted to sing". I partially thought that due to the guitar in the corner. And the posters of all the boy bands on her walls.

"Wanted? You still do don't you?"

"Whats the point? I'm a stripper. I'm worthless"

"A wise man once told me that no one is worthless unless they think of themselves otherwise"

"Why do I have a feeling you totally made that up?" She asked while I got up to get her guitar

"I don't know what you're talking about. Now take this and sing a little something for me"

"I don't sing in front of people"

"Well too bad. We both are in the same situation here and have to help each other out. You with your singing and me with L"

"Woah easy boy. If I can't get enough money from singing, I need this job to keep me alive"

"Well who's telling you to quit? Lets make a deal here, I'll help you with your music-"

"And I can help you get a girl! The deal is sealed"

"Okay then", we both shook each others hand like we had such signed an important contract.

I'm finally getting an extreme make over.