✔Invisible Girl | Bts Seokjin

•Chapter 17•

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🔼 Mild smut warning 🔼

*Y/N POV*

What was this feeling, this heavy and sinking feeling in my invisible chest?

Had I fallen for this guy?

I stood silent, waiting for him to finish making breakfast before sitting down.

He and I had decided to spend that morning in the garden since it was one of his few days off, picking some strawberries and other fruits from the small greenhouse he had apparently made on his own.

He used those fruits for our breakfast, making a berry smoothie and some pancakes with strawberries.

Like always, it was delicious, and I couldn't help but wonder how Hani had gotten so lucky.

She was about to marry the most handsome guy in the world with amazing cooking skills to come with the package.

Suddenly my vision blurred, the dining table I was sitting on turning into a rainy road. I could see two caskets, people walking past me in black clothing.

"I'm sorry for your loss," they said every time they glanced over at me.

No.

"This is simply a memory, a bad nightmare Y/N...wake up," I thought to myself, my hands grabbing the side of my oversized sweatshirt.

I could feel my skin crawling with goosebumps. It was the memory of the worst days of my life, my heart nearly stopping at the sight of Jackson placing a rose in my mother's coffin.

"NO DON'T DIE ON ME!!" I yelled, my tears falling as soon as I reached out. The rain hit my skin like burning embers.

"Don't worry, I'll be here for your daughter," Jackson promised.

"No don't die, please," I begged, my hand still outstretched, attempting to touch my parents one last time, Jackson and his father pulling me back.

"Let me go! I want to die with them! Jackson don't let them die!! Please don't let them die!!" I continued to cry, but a sudden shake brought me back to earth.

Well more like limbo.

It was Jin, holding me tight between his arms.

"It's okay Y/N, it's okay. They're in a better place now," he comforted.

I cried harder, the tears I had spilled at first soon becoming streams.

Better place?

I wanted to go to that better place. I wanted to forget everything, to be by their side and forget the horror life was without them. I felt disgusting, nauseous. I felt like I wanted to peel my skin away and wash it off. I felt unclean and alone.

His own tears began to consume him, his arms holding me tighter between his arms.

"It's okay, it's okay baby, please don't cry. Please don't cry it hurts me too," he mumbled.

My heart skipped a beat, but both of the overwhelming feelings just made me want to hide in a hole and cry. I wanted to be alone. I wanted to go away. I didnt want his comfort. I didnt want to care about anyone or anything. I just wanted to die.

He backed up cleaning my tears with his thumb and smiling at me.

"Let's stay positive okay?"

I simply hiccuped, still trying to regain control of my body and mind. It was hard. The overwhelming feeling of dread and self-loathing made it almost impossible.