Inside My Mind

Me?

Why do people find it fun to take their anger out on me. Why do people think it's fun to pick on me.  Why do people think it's fun to use me. Why do people think it's fun to play with my heart.

Three days. Three days it took for her to finally take it all out on me. I was expecting it none the less, but three days. I don't know why they chose me though, they could've chose someone else, someone who can handle it, someone who can hold it together at the end of the day, someone who doesn't cry themselves to sleep every night. Someone who doesn't talk to themselves because their self is the only person who understands them. Why me?

I've never understood what they're so angry at, what set them off in the first place. Is it me? Are they always angry at me? Is it because I'm not as good as everyone else? Is it because everyone else towers over me and sees me as an easy target? I don't know. But I don't blame anyone but myself.

I used myself as a canvas a few times, but I don't want to anymore. I don't want to cause more harm to myself than I already have. I don't like the thought of someone I care about doing it, so I won't do that to them. Not many people care about me, but that's okay. Nobody has to love me. I don't love me, so why should anybody else feel the need to.

I don't know what else to say.

~K.I