Mind

THE DISGRACE

Kong had not eaten the previous night, was he excited, or lost appetite, he could not decide.  He woke up somewhere in the middle of the night surrounded by the mist, coldness of the night, stars and the moon.  The moon was enchanting to him as he slowly opened his eyes with still a rotating campus all round him.  Was he going  round or the world, he did not understand.   All he knew was  when he opened his eyes, he saw the moon, stars and the ground on which he lay on the grass, behind the tree.  He did not have the watch and the surrounding also lacked it.  He was unaware of the time.  Yet he was happy that it was night and missed today's DISGRACE ACT.

He wondered who would ever miss him if he did not go home even for one evening, no one.  Yet that hungry Dark Figure would miss him not out of love but out of  lust and  passion.  He did not remember when it started, how it started, but he knew it started with never ending  trauma.  Every night his soul was ripped open wounding and bleeding him without any guilt or remorse by the Dark Figure.  He felt dirty, unclean and repulsive. He hated his body which was not his, but belonged to that Dark Figure.  He tossed and manhandled little Kong according to his whims and fancies.  

Once he watched a movie, which talked about the honour of girls mattered the most.  It was those evil men who robed them of their virginity,  slaughtering their ego little b little.  But what about the boys?  Are they safe in their own homes?  Safe from their kith and keens. No.  The answer he knew was NO.  He was not safe in his own home.  The DARK FIGURE was the most respected man of his family.  His parents would rather believe him than his diseased unwanted boy.  He tried his best to voice his disgrace to them, but to no avail.  

He was happy since two days, because of his Arthit, it would be the first time he would not experience such a Soul ripping disgrace by the Dark Figure.  His Arthit was the saviour indirectly though.  He came to his life to wipe out all his pain, sorrow and fear.  For the first time, he did not feel repulsive over his body because it was the first time untouched by the Dark  Figure.  Otherwise, he would had to fight him that day to save his body, which then belonged to his Arthit.  His heart, his body, his soul had found the owner, yet the MIND WAS SOLELY ALONE, NOR HIS, NOR ARTHIT'S.  IT WAS IT'S OWNER. Thinking of all these, he lay there quietly in the darkness of the night, feeling relaxed, happy and  content with his life then.

He had fallen in love, too deep, where only his Arthit could take him out.   He needed Him for his body, he needed Him for breathing, for living and for life.  He had no aims, ambitions in life, but since the day he came to his life, he then had a will to make HIM, His.  He did not know about the practicality of life, nor the pragmatic notion of day to day transactions, all he knew that then  HE HAD A WILL, A STRONG WILLED MIND TO  MAKE ARTHIT HIS.

He would not kill himself  and would live, cherish, dream and will for his ARTHIT.  His  Arthit would suck in all  disgraceful fluids left over by the Dark Figure and replace it  with HIS  own pleasant and yet refreshing  energy booster drink. 

KONG  WAS GETTING ALL WORKED UP, HE DESIRED ARTHIT  PHYSICALLY OR MORE APT  BODILY, BECAUSE HIS OWN BODY WAS SUCKED IN, TORTURED AND BRUISED BY THE DARK FIGURE, HE  NEEDED ARTHIT TO WIPE OUT ALL THOSE UNPLEASANTNESS AND DISGRACEFULNESS TRAUMA FROM HIS BODY, THOUGH MENTALLY ARTHIT  HAD ALREADY STARTED TO DRAIN OUT ALL HIS FEAR, FRUSTRATION, COWARDICE AND ABOVE ALL THE WILL TO DIE INCH BY INCH.   I FOUND ARTHIT FOR KONG, KNOWING VERY WELL HE WOULD BRING KONG OUT OF THAT ENDLESS ABYSS.

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As stated earlier, I am getting obsessed by this story, it is becoming murkier day by day.  I am getting lot of ideas, but I am restraining myself.  I feel it is kind of dark.