Confusion

Chapter 28

Angela's POV

I looked into Luke's eyes and they were filled with disbelief which made me sigh.

"I'm tired. I'm just so damn tired of all this," I stated as I ran the knife over my wrist. Luke snapped out of his thoughts and lunged for the knife. I just sighed and gave it to him, knowing he wasn't going to give up. The hurt and disbelief on Luke's face made me want to kill myself. But if I did that I would just have been hurting Luke even more. Luke threw the knife in the bin and wrapped me in his arms.

"Why?" He choked and stroked my hair.

"I'm tired of all this. Maybe death will help everyone including me," I shrugged warily.

"No please don't talk like that. If you get hurt then I'll kill myself. Please never think like that again," Luke cupped my cheeks in his hands and stared into my eyes.

"What was on Twitter was all lies and stupid comments from my so called fans,"Luke said sternly as a tear slipped from his eyes.

"It's not just Twitter. I couldn't care less of what they think about me but it hurt that everyone thought about me like that. It was just the tip of the iceberg, I guess," I shrugged and walked away from Luke and slipped into my bed. Luke took my phone and fiddled with it before sitting by me. Tears ran down his face as he looked at me. I felt so numb. All the pain of the last few months had finally taken place.

"Don't ever do that. Never in my life do I want to see your blood okay?" He pleaded and I didn't answer, "Self-Harm is no joke. People do it when the feel alone and ugly but they're not. You have me here with you and we can work through all this drama." I nodded and pulled the covers to my chin and turned my back to Luke. I felt so ashamed that I gave in and harmed myself in front of Luke. I felt so weak when I did that that it made me angry. Luke sighed and walked out of the room. I let a few tears escape before quickly wiping them away and promising not to cry to myself. Ten minutes later and I heard a knock on the door before it creaked open.

"If you're a rapist/axe murderer then go away," I mumbled, half-asleep. I had fooled everyone into thinking I actually slept but I just stared at my ceilings thinking of how my life sucks. I heard a deep voice chuckle behind me so I turned around to see a sad Ashton.

"What do you want?" I asked warily, knowing the reason. His eyes darted to my arms and he sighed. I quickly pulled the covers over my arms so he didn't see too much.

"This is wrong Angie. This is really wrong. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about. I used to self harm too. I used to get bullied so much that I started cutting myself. At the time, it felt good, but now I regret cutting so much not just because it did no good to me, it also hurt my family and the ones who love me. And believe it or not, every single person that is sitting outside loves you, that's why we're here. Even Eric, Aiden, their dad, Brianna and Cece came to check on you. See how much everyone cares about you and you're not just hurting yourself but everyone else around you.," Ashton urged me to listen while I nodded.

"I stopped cutting for my family and fans, now please stop cutting for every single person out there that cares about you and loves you. You're the strongest girl I've ever met; I'm absolutely shocked at what you went through yet you're still okay-ish," Ashton smiled sheepishly at me and I nodded, I didn't think I'd be able to talk without crying.

"Luke is tearing himself apart out there because he feels like this is all his fault and that he could've done more to help you. He's going mad at the fact that you felt the need to cut. He thought that because I went thorough the same, I could help you. Trust me, you'll regret cutting very soon. We love you and care about you. You're like a second sister to me, next to my real sister. I care about you too much to let you do this...." Ashton sighed as I opened my mouth to say something but a sob came out. Ashton automatically wrapped his arms around me and let me cry into his chest.