psycho | jaeden lieberher

nineteen

When I got home Lilia called me and I declined, then Maddie called twice and I declined both. I didn't feel like talking to them, I didn't feel like talking to anyone. My window shade was still closed, so it felt like night from the second I got in my room. I wanted to open it, to see what was going on in Jaeden's room, but I decided against it. I didn't want to become a stalker too. 

By 8 I make the awful decision to steal pour a glass of my moms good vodka into a water bottle and bring it to my room, because I've been through too much shit the past weekend to not get drunk. It wasn't enough to get shit faced, but it was enough to not have a miserable night.

By 9 I have absolutely nothing to do, so I decide to just fuck it and look out my window, even though it was probably the vodkas idea. The camera is still there, still pointed in the same place. Does he never move it? Did he not notice I saw it? I close the shade again, and just sit on my bed staring at my phone. I pray someone interesting texts me. Lilia texted me telling me to call her and help her decide what guy to go on a date with this week, Maddie texted me asking about the math homework. But I didn't respond to either of them, because I just didn't feel in the mood for talking to people about dumb shit. I just want to talk to someone about something interesting. I don't know who that person is though, if it's Finn, or Jaeden, or some mystery guy. 

By 9:30 I decide to fuck it and open the shade completely. Jaeden's bedroom light is on, but I don't see him from the view I have. I turn away from the window and grab the first object I see that I wouldn't mind losing, which ends up being a half empty stick of lip balm. When I walk back to the window I open mine, and chuck the lip balm at Jaeden's closed window, hoping the sound is loud enough to be heard. It makes a small thud, that I can barely hear, but Lieberher heard it.

"What the fuck?" Jaeden says as he opens his bedroom window and sticks his head out.

"Is that camera on?" I cut right to the chase, hoping he doesn't try to pull some scary shit.

"No, why?" Really?

"A light was blinking, I thought that meant it was recording?"

Jaeden picks up his camera and flips is around so he can see the blinking light, then he flips it around again so I can see the screen part. "See, it's off. I think the light means it needs to be charged." He explains.

"Ok, good." I move my head back into my room, and begin to close the window.

"Did you think I was recording you or some shit? I'm not a stalker, Corinne." 

"Sure you're not." I smirk at him, then close my window. I walk away from it, to go on my phone and text Maddie considering that after our last phone call she thinks Jaeden is recording me. Halfway through my typing I hear a light thud hit my window, fucking Lieberher.

"What?" I open my window. I look down out of it, to see what he threw. It's a fucking spiderman PEZ toy, of course this nerd would have that.

"We're not done here." He smiles. Oh god, he is proud of himself for this. 

"Why not?" 

He doesn't respond, as if he isn't even sure. After a moment of silence finally opens his mouth, "Wanna meet outside?" 

Five minutes later I am standing outside in my pajama shorts, tank top, and slippers. I hear the door of Jaeden's house being shut, and suddenly he is standing in front of me. We are standing on the sidewalk in front of our houses, I'm technically still on my property and he is on his. 

"Quite smiling like that." I look up at him. He is staring at me, with a huge grin on his face.

"You look cold. Want my sweatshirt?" Of course he has to dodge my question and be a fucking gentleman. I shake my head, even though I wouldn't mind it.

"Why did you wanna meet out here?" I ask, rubbing my bare arms with my hands. He pulls his hoodie off, and gently hands it to me. It's huge, and has an Eagles logo on it, but I put it on. The warmth and smell of him linger on it, and it's almost comforting.

"It was uncomfortable talking from our windows." He bites his lip, in the most awkward uncomfortable way.

"Yeah right. I know you just wanted to be closer to me." 

"Why would I want that? You just accused me of being a perv." He brings that up of course.

I decide to take a fun approach with this to try to get him to forgive me, instead of just saying sorry. "You sure, because I bet you missed being able to get close to me without it being acting." I take a step closer to him, bringing me on to his property now.

"You're right, I missed you." Fuck, he is playing too. He steps closer, so we are once again found at this uncomfortably comfortable closeness.

"Well, I guess I missed you too." I stare into his eyes, they're brighter than ever in the darkness somehow. His hair looks good right now, messy. I like it like that.

"You smell like alcohol, did you really miss me that much you had to get drunk to talk to me?"

"No." I lie. And I know for a fact that one was a lie.

"Do you still love Finn?" 

What the fuck? "I don't think so." 

"I'll pretend you just said no." Jaeden smirks. Whatever he has going, I think I like it.

"Do you have a crush on me or something, Lieberher?"

"Of course not." My heart sinks for some reason. "But I think you have a crush on me." He steps closer, raising my heart back up. At this point it's almost impossible for us to get closer. We're at the point that if I moved my hand at all it would touch his. We're at the point that if he just lowered his head and I went on my tip toes our lips could collide.

I tilt my head up so I can see him better. "Why would you think that?"

"Because you're letting me do this." He lifts his hand and puts it under my chin, using his pointer finger and thumb to raise my head so I meet his lips. The kiss is just a peck, but I know that's just what he wanted. But it's not what I wanted. I put my hand behind his neck and pull him back down to me as I go on my lip toes, forcing another kiss, a deeper one. His hands find the small of my back, and he pulls me closer to him. He doesn't grab my butt like Finn used to, he just leaves his hands on my back. Holding me close, making sure I don't go away. And I like that. And I like him.