29 - (o)

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idfc // blackbear

"I can't talk to her," Austin shook his head as we sat in the car in front of the bank. I sighed and continued to listen to him because I didn't know what else to do. "I don't even know what to say to her."

"I think it would help for you to just feel her presence right now," I nodded to him. He shook his head and started crying, immediately wiping the tears away.

"Just take me home, Olivia. I really hate doing this to you," He sighed. "The sooner you take me home, the sooner I'm out of your life."

I huffed and opened the door of Izzy's car that I had borrowed once again, getting out. I walked over to Austin's side and opened his door.

"Come on," I nodded to him.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he got out of the car.

"Going up there with you," I sighed, locking the car and putting the keys in my back pocket. "Let's go, Austin."

Once we arrived at the top, Austin just stood there, not saying a word. All I could hear was the faint sound of honking horns and the occasional gust of wind.

"You have to try to get this out," I finally spoke up. "You have told me countless times that nothing makes you feel better than when you talk to your mom."

"I just don't feel like it, okay? Fuck!" He snapped. I closed my eyes in an attempt to not yell at him. I was fed up.

"You know what? Fuck it," I threw my hands up and began to walk away.

"Olivia, wait," he said in a calmer tone. "If I let you walk away right now, my mom would be so disappointed in me."

I didn't say anything. I didn't even turn around. I just waited for whatever he was going to say next, if he even did.

"I talk to the sky, Liv," he said. "This place? It isn't my mom."

"You're right," I turned around and nodded at him. "She is with you always."

"It's just... I always felt closer to her up here. Like I'm closer to heaven," he said. "And then I met you."

"What do I have to do with anything?" I asked him.

"You're proof that angels are on Earth, too," he told me.

"Austin, stop," I huffed.

"I'm serious. You make me feel closer to my mom in a way," he shook his head as he sat on the ground. "I don't know. I'm really messed up right now."

I walked over to him and sat beside him. I was worried about him, truthfully.

"Austin, if I ask you something, you promise to be honest with me?" I said, looking out at the city.

"Of course," He said.

"Did you alter yourself with something other than alcohol?" I asked him, not wanting the answer. I knew alcohol wasn't the only factor in how he was acting.

"No," He shook his head and I instantly felt relief. "I have but not tonight."

"Then why are you so drunk?" I asked him. "You don't stay drunk this long."

"I had a lot," He nodded to himself. I looked at his bloody lip and reached up to touch it, wiping the blood away. He looked at me with hopeful eyes and it broke my heart.

"I'll take you home and we can clean your lip," I told him. "Plus, you're really drunk and you need to sleep it off."

"Baby, I'm fine," he said and we both just shut up. "I did not mean to call you that, I am so sorry."

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