It's Complicated

Chapter 11

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"What the hell do you mean I'm grounded? I haven't done anything wrong!" I yelled at my mom, balling up my fists in anger.

"You don't do shit, Mitch. I wish you hadn't been born, it could've saved me a whole lotta trouble," She snarled. "As soon as you get out of high school, because it'll be a miracle if you graduate, you're getting the fuck out of my house. I don't want to see you ever again once you leave."

"I'd be more than happy to!" I yelled and stomped up the stairs. She was always doing this to me, treating me like shit and then abusing her power as my mother. I fucking ha- I stopped myself. She's my mom. I don't hate her. I can't hate her. But oh how I want to, so badly. When I reached my room, I made sure to slam the door shut. I knew it wouldn't affect her, but I had to show my anger somehow.

Why did I still feel like I had to care about her? Every single day she would treat me like a piece of garbage and say the most unthinkable profanities to me. I had every reason to hate her, right? The answer was yes. But it didn't feel right. I could never hate her. I would never hate her, because no matter how hard I tried, all the memories from when I was a child would come back. 

I groaned and laid down on my bed, stretching out. "She used to love me," I whispered. I sniffed and thought about how I would spend my weekend, considering I was grounded.

When I got gorunded, for my mom that meant only going out for school and that was basically it. She had started to get her drugs from her new boyfriend, who was also a drug dealer, so I didn't have to worry about that anymore. Life was coming together, but just like many great things in life for me, they would no doubt start falling apart soon enough. 

I was not eager for that to happen. 

I stood up and walked over to my dresser, picking up my new phone Mine had broken a few weeks ago, and I had been phone-less. After a minor battle about it, Scott had bought me a new phone, but how he had enough money for that when he lived on a teacher's salary was beyond me. I had asked him about it, and he had cleared his throat and asked me to drop the subject. 

Scott and I had exchanged numbers, but Scott hadn't approved. He insisted that it put us in greater risk of getting caught. But I wanted to talk to him, and to be able to reach him.. in case something really bad were to happen with my mom. He didn't know that she hit me, he thought the incident when he had found me on the road was the first and only time. She wasn't super violent, and besides it didn't cause any major damage, so I wasn't going to tell him. He already worried about me enough.

Finally we had agreed to have each other as contacts, but had created nicknames for each other. He wouldn't tell me what my name was in his phone, so of course I was keeping his from him too. It was probably something stupid like 'shortie' too. In my phone, he was 'Scotland' which only proved that I had the creativity of a worm. But it worked better than 'Scott Hoying.'

I heard someone coming up the stairs but didn't move my position. If it was my mom, she could say whatever she needed to say. If she was coming up here to hit me, then I would deal with it. The door to my room opened, and I mentally cursed myself for not locking the door. It was Bruce, and the two of us awkwardly looked at each other for a little bit. 

My relationship with Bruce was complicated. He was completely obvious to the way my mom treated me, but he didn't discourage nor encourage it. At first he had joined in om the taunting, but then he had stopped. He didn't care about me enough to help me, but he didn't dislike me enough to rejoin in on the physical and verbal abuse. I figured he was up here to deliver a message because he obviously wasn't here to give me a present. I looked at him with  bored expression.