Harry Potter Characters X Reader

(4) Severus/Lupin X Depressed Reader

As you walked down the grey stone walls of the dungeon halls, you gripped your wrists as if you were afraid to find that your sleeves were gone. The idea of Professor Lupin knowing that you were a werewolf was still dawning on you, at least he didn't know about your depression. If you weren't stuck under a stormy grey rain-cloud, you might found the fact that two if your teachers knew your two biggest secrets.

Before you had time to think about what to say, you found yourself outside the door to Professor Snape's office. You gulped nervously knowing that he would be asking more questions. A tiny part of you told you that this was the right thing to do. It wasn't often that you listened to this little voice in your head, normally you obey the loud voice of depression, but listening to this voice normally ends well. You raised your hand slightly and knocked on the door. There was no turning back now.

"Come in," called the voice of a grumpy Professor Snape.

You stepped into the room.

"I could come back later if you want," you quietly suggested.

The professor's face softened when he saw who it was, he even smiled.

"It is ok Y/N, come sit down," he motioned to a seat opposite his.

As you walked up to his desk, you took note of how neatly things were arranged. It was definitely different from your messy dorm. You sat down on the seat and looked up into the dark brown eyes of your professor.

"I wanted to ask you a few questions Y/N. I want you to answer them truthfully," he told you.

You nod and mentally prepare yourself, coming up with answers to potential questions.

"Is your family life good?"

This was a difficult question because you didn't like to bring this topic up but you still tried your best to tell the truth.

"I...um...my family.....let me start from the start," you stutter.

And so you end up telling your life story, leaving out the part about you being a werewolf. It was still all true just omitting some of the facts.

"My family always preferred my sister, Mary, she was practically perfect in ever single way. She was pretty, happy and always smiled. Marie could make me feel better even when I was sad," you could feel tears running down your cheeks," When I was 7 Marie and I were ....in an accident and she..she ..she died. My parents thought it was my fault, which it probably was, and got even more sour towards me."

Professor Snape's eyes widened and his hand reached over to your shoulder.

"I'm sorry Y/N, I had no idea you had gone through all this," he sympathised.

"It's ok, like you said, you didn't know...no body knows."

"Well I know that you are bullied by most students at Hogwarts but do you have any friends?" He asked.

"Ahh..umm...well," you didn't want to seem completely helpless but you told the truth anyway, "...no...."

"Y/N why didn't you tell anyone you were going through all this? You know that every teacher would be more than happy to help you."

"That's just it, I don't want to be weak. I can do it on my own. Besides the teachers wouldn't understand or want to help especially not McGonagall, she hates me," you looked down at your hands.

"That's not true Y/N, I would've listened," he said sounding a bit hurt.

"I'm sorry for not telling anyone," you apologised, hoping to make him feel better.

"Last question now Y/N. How long have you been cutting?"

You seriously considered lying to this question. Not meeting his eyes you looked up.

"Umm....hmmmm....ever since I started at Hogwarts.....I think?"

"Y/N really?" He didn't sound annoyed in his normal way, more in a caring way.

You nod still not meeting his eyes.

"Look at me Y/N."

You meet his dark brown eyes once again.

"Roll up your sleeves," he commanded.

Your hands shaking you slowly roll up your sleeves. It was no surprise to see many deep scars running along your arm.

"The other one as well."

You had purposely only rolled up that sleeve because your left arm was worse. You looked up at him, as if to ask 'do I have to?' Just like last time, he reached his hand to your cuffed sleeve and started to roll it up. Before he had even rolled it up to half way up your wrist, many scars were revealed. He paused for a moment to asses the situation but then continued to roll up your sleeve to your elbow.

"Y/N, I know it might be hard at first but you have to stop cutting," he said.

You could hold back your tears no longer so you let them race down your cheeks, once again.

"Professor....," you wept.

He stood up and walked around to your side of the desk.

"It's ok Y/N," he hushed you,"It's ok."

He gave you a hug around your shoulders as you cried. You both stayed still for a matter of minutes.

"Y/N, I won't ask you to show me but are there cuts on your thighs?"

"...yes..."

"Promise me you'll at least try to stop Y/N."

"Ok..I'll try...that doesn't mean I'll succeed."

"Great! You can go now, remember to come back if you need anything."

"Ok bye Professor," you waved at him and he waved back.

~Time Skip: In the dorms~

Although it was incredibly hard for you, you kept your promise and didn't cut. For the first time in many, many days you went to bed peacefully.