Harry Potter Characters X Reader

(5) Severus/Lupin X Depressed Reader

You woke early in the morning, just as usual, but something was different about today. Today, you didn't wake up with the sensation of feeling the crusty blood of your sleeves. On a normal day you would've reached straight for you blade and added a few extra scars to your collection but you had made a promise to try to turn over a new leaf. Your dormmates weren't up yet so you slipped into your uniform and headed to the common room.

It was empty, as usual again, and on a normal day you would go sit in a corner and put pressure on your wrists. It hurt to think of all the things that you weren't doing. Cutting was like a drug, an addicting drug, once you start, your body craves more. You desperately tried to put it off your mind, to think of other things.

You didn't have DADA today and you considered that a good thing. The last thing you wanted was to be near Professor Lupin again, he knew your deepest secret; you are a werewolf. You had actually considered him to be a person who would understand your problem, the way his eyes were soft and sympathetic and how he smiled so warmly. Like people he was also speechless at the fact that you were a werewolf and ... well he hadn't actually said that he didn't like you but you could see the fear in his eyes. What did you do to deserve this?

~Time Skip: Breakfast~

Like all other days, you walked into the grand hall, sat down and had a little nibble ogpf your toast. All around you, the other kids were eating like pigs but it made you feel sick in the stomach. You hadn't eaten a proper meal in so long now that the thought of it made you want to vomit.

You had a free period first so you went to your common room to study. You tried desperately to keep your mind off cutting but the voice in the back of your head was very persistent. 'The bathroom is right there, your blade is in there.... blades were made to be used!' It yelled.

You could hardly resist and you decided to give in to the voice in your head. You locked yourself in the bathroom and experienced the sensation that you had grown so familiar with. (I don't want to describe the cutting in detail in case it disturbs some people ;) )

Your eyes were red and your wrists were sore and you didn't want to attract attention so you left the common room and started to head towards the library.

On your way, you came across a lost first year. She was sitting on the ground crying with her books spilled all over the floor. Her Ravenclaw scarf was drained in tears and she had bruises on ther arms.

&Hey, are you ok?" You ask her while handing her back one of her books.

"I'm good... just a little lost," she sniffed.

You helped her gather her books back up and tidying up her uniform. You didn't notice that when your were helping the girl the sleeves of your almost too small jumper had rolled up and your fresh scars were now visible.

"What are those red things on your arms?" The girl asked innocently.

You widened your eyes in surprise and quickly rolled your sleeves back down. The look in the girl's eyes told you that she had no idea what your cuts were. You were not about to reveal this poor girl to the harsh truths of life so instead, you tell a small lie.

"Well you see, these cuts.... are what happens to you if you are very sad for too long,"

She seems to believe it and pulls you into a tight hug.

"Please be happy again!" She pleads.

You put on your best fake smile and you can see the little girl's eyes light up when you do. She tells you her next class is DADA so you show her where it is, even though you would rather avoid Professor Lupin right now.

~ Time Skip: at DADA classroom ~

You take a deep breath and knock on the door. Professor Lupin answers with a cheerful voice saying 'come in.' You open the door and try not to make eye contact with Professor Lupin.

"I think you might be missing a student," you tell him.

"Why yes. Ariana your classmates told me that you were in the bathroom, is that true?" He asks.

All eyes fall on the tiny blue eyed Ravenclaw.

"No! Eve and Lilly pushed me over on the staircase and then the stairs changed and then I was lost!"

Everyone looked at a pair of guilty looking Ravenclaws. One stood up and faced Professor Lupin.

"Ariana doesn't belong in Ravenclaw! She's destroying our perfect reputation at being the smartest house "

The other girl then stood up.

"Yeah, Ariana isn't smart at all! I don't know why she even got into Ravenclaw!"

Professor Lupin looked at the girls in astonishment.

"Girls, it's not ok it ridicule someone for being different! I'm sure Ariana has an excellent reason to be in Ravenclaw! It's not just all about being smart you know! Both of you report to my office after school for all of this week for detention!" The normally kind teacher was clearly angry.

"Ariana go sit down and please stay in after class," his face softened.

The little girl quickly walked over to the only empty desk which was next to a couple of Hufflepuffs. They smiled at her and they tried to make her feel happy. Seeing this gives you a warm fuzzy feeling in your heart and it makes you wish that you had people like this in your life. Well, other than Professor Snape but you still do not completely trust him.

Professor Lupin then turns to you and you instantly look down.

"(Y/N) .... thank you for bringing Ariana back."

"It's Ok," you say, still not looking at him.

"It's safe with me you know... your secret I mean."

Your eyes widen and you look up at him. His brilliant grey-blue eyes locking with your (E/C) ones. For the first time you pay attention to the faded scars on his face, they look like they were made about a month ago.

Wait. One month ago was the full moon. Your eyes dart to the calander that was up on the wall. There was a circle around today and upyou notice there is a circle around the full moon. How could you have forgotten?

You look back at Professor Lupin and then to the ground.

"Don't talk to me about that...please." You whisper.

You then turn on your heels and head out the door.