Namjoon

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11 April Year 22

As I turned away after filling up the oil, something brushed past my face and fell on the ground. I took a step back, and when I looked down I saw a crumpled bill. I leaned over and my hand reached forward as a reflex. The people sitting in the car bursts into laughter. I stopped at an instant.

Seokjin hyung was there, watching. How do I deal when I meet eyes with people who drive around expensive cars, mocking and ignoring others? I have to face it. If their behavior is unjust, you have to confront them. Its not a matter of courage, of self-respect or equality.

But this is a gas station and I am just a part time worker. If a customer throws garbage I have to pick it up. If a customer swears I have to listen to them. If a customer throws the bill on the ground I have to pick it up. I was shaken by this contempt. I clenched my fists. My nails dug into my skin.

Then somebody picked up the bill. And he handed it to me. The people in the car groaned in disappointment as they left the gas station. I couldn't lift my head after they left. I couldn't meet Seokjin hyung's eyes. My cowardice, my poverty, and my situation. Hyung shouldn't know that. I didn't want him to see it. To see me like this.

Seokjin hyung stood at the end of my gaze and didn't move. He didn't come up closer, nor started a conversation.

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