No More Games

58

Lauren's Point Of View

After Sasha left for work this morning, I felt alone and bored in the house. Despite having my beautiful baby girl, Raelynn with me, Shad and Trevor lounging around, I felt as if I was completely alone.

Depressed and alone.

My mind kept going back to that unreal evening of September 1st. The day I lost the love of my life while I was gaining a new one. Till this day, I can't understand why I was the one chosen to go through all this bullshit.

Despite Michael being the target of Jermaine's nefarious schemes, I was the one plagued with the most pain. To know that I met this man whom I fell deeply in love with, thinking I was a stranger to him as he was to me, was playing me like a fucking fiddle for Jermaine's evil ass.

Now my daughter will grow up without a father. How will I ever trust or love another man again?

Ever since that day, I never could bring myself to go into our house. I just couldn't do it. I feel like that whole house is a lie. Everything Andre and I ever had is just straight lies.

However, these past couple of days, I've been contemplating going back to the house. Not to stay but to just do a walk through.

I need some sort of closure before I pack up everything and make a decision on what I'm going to do with the house.

"Hey, Trev. . ." I lightly knocked on his door before pushing it open, finding him lounged on his bed playing his game.

"What's up, sis?" He quickly glanced over at me. "You alright?"

"Yeah, I just wanted to ask you for a favor." I walked into his room and sat on the edge of his bed.

He paused his game and sat up. "Yeah, what's up?"

"I'm ready to go back to the house and I would like if you came with me."

"Whoa," he frowned, scooting closer to me. "Lauren, are you sure—I mean, yeah I'll go with you but are you sure you're ready to go back?"

All I could do is nod as a flood of emotions took over me, releasing a deluge of tears from my eyes.

Trevor pulled me into an embrace to comfort me. "I got you, sis. I got you."

•

I walked alongside Trevor up the driveway of the place I once shared with Andre. The place I once called home.

Chills ran down my spine just walking towards the door. I kept thinking about Raelynn, whom I left with her uncle Shad back at home, and how she'll never get the chance to live in this house that her father baby proofed months before she arrived. She'll never get to run around and play here, hearing her daddy root for her with every little step she takes. She'll never know how much this place meant to us and how ready we were to receive her in it.

I took a deep breath and handed Trevor the key.

"You wanna go in together or do you want me to go in first?" Trevor looked at me as he inserted the key into the lock.

"Together."

He turned the key and unlocked it, opening the door right after.

That familiar smell hit me like a tidal wave, bringing back so many wonderful memories I wish I could relive. Memories that now make me wonder if the person I shared them with, felt the same way I felt when those memories were being conceived.

I took one step in and followed it with another. I slowly walked towards the living room, looking and feeling around as if I were in an exhibit.

"Everything looks so. . .dusty." I whispered.