The Handsome Devil

Chapter 34 - Jamie

"Jamie" She breathed out in between sobs, but his expression remained ice cold.

"What are you doing here?" He looked around while he said that, as if making sure no one can see them.

She could feel her heartbeat fasten. What am I supposed to say? 'Well, I kinda got kidnapped and my captor forced me to come'? Swallowing the lump in her throat, she forced herself to stop crying.

"I'm visiting my father." The lie came out easily, perhaps because it technically wasn't one. After all, she did see her father the day before.

Jamie gave her a little nod, seemingly disinterested in her reply.

"Tell him I said hi." He murmured after a while and turned around to leave, which caused Deya to panic.

Her hand shot up and caught his wrist the moment he moved. It's now or never.

The sensation of feeling his skin against her own seemed odd after all the time that has passed. In a way, it felt as finding your beloved childhood toy once you're an adult.

There was the thrill of looking at it and touching it again, undoubtedly because it brought back the memories of all the wonderful adventures you had together. But even with the memories, you realise that holding the toy could never feel the way it did when you were a child, because of the multitude of experiences that you've had along the way.

"Please, don't do this to yourself." She couldn't hide her pain as she kept switching between looking at Jamie's gloomy eyes and the pocket she knew he put the drugs in.

For a fraction of second, his expression softened and the girl felt her hopes rising. He can hate me all he wants, but I won't let him destroy himself.

Nonetheless, one blink was enough to make it all disappear. Jerking his hand out of her hold, Jamie took a step back before sending her a hateful glare.

"You lost the right to intervene in my life the day you left me." The amount of venom in his voice felt as a stab. However, it was the fact that he's right that made it so excruciating, and she was well aware.

"I'm sorry.." The words were hardly comprehensible over her sobbing, but it didn't seem to matter anyway, as Jamie cut her off swiftly.

"Don't." He ran his fingers through his golden locks few times as if trying to calm down.

"Just don't give me the 'I'm sorry' bullshit" The words were hissed through gritted teeth, the aggression of it all startling Deya instantly. Who is this Jamie?

"I--" She tried to speak only to be interrupted again.

"No!" The shout made the girl jump a little. She could see the veins in his neck throbbing violently, and the sight sent shivers down her spine.

"You think you can just appear after three years of no contact, and waltz right back into my life?" Jamie let out a maniacal laugh before piercing her with his glare. "You never even gave me an explanation."

The girl's mouth opened and closed again. No matter how sickening the pain she felt was, there was nothing she could say in her defense.

"And you have the audacity to tell me not to do this to myself." For emphasis, Jamie's fingers formed quotation marks when he cited her own words.

"Well, I've got a newsflash for you. I don't do this to myself." Pointing to her, the man inched closer till his fingertip painfully buried into her chest. "You did this to me."

She closed her eyes and more tears poured out. Somehow, this situation felt thousand times worse than any of the nightmares she had since the accident. Perhaps, it was the fact that no matter how much she tries, there's no waking up from this suffering.