Being Shane Dawson's Daughter

Chapter 11 Back Home

Trigger warning ⚠️ this will talk about depression and self harm. Please if you are struggling with something PLEASE talk to someone. Get help ASAP don't go into unhealthy habits it doesn't just effect you it effects everyone. Trust me I know.
Your P.O.V.
We finally got home and I flopped on the couch exhausted. I didn't realize dad was there until I looked up again,"Hey dad." I greeted
"Hey how was school." Dad asked while working on his laptop. Probably editing again.
"Fine I guess." I replied
"That's good." He said still working on his laptop not taking his eyes off the screen. I sighed and walked to my room. I closed my door and dumped my backpack on my bed and flopped on it. I put in my headphones and started listening to LEGO House by Ed Sheeran  (You can start the song now) . I silently sung along to it this is the song I usually listen to when I'm down. I used to play this song all the time when I was young. Anytime it would come on I'd turn the song up loud I always made my dad listen to it.I guess it's like a father daughter song.I wasn't mad at my dad or anything I know he's just doing his job but... I just want him around a bit more, I felt tears fall down my cheeks I put my face in my pillow and cried silently.I'm happy for dad but he's just been working constantly. It's like work is more important to him. I understand why but... I don't know anymore ~TRIGGER WARNING~
I sat up and wiped my eyes. I looked around my room and went into my dresser and found my old razor. I looked at my arm with old scars on it I cried even more. I placed the cold blade on my arm I know I shouldn't do it. But I don't know how else to deal with my pain I pressed a bit harder into my arm and cut it. It hurt so bad but it went away. I kept doing it a few more times.
Shane's P.O.V.
"Shane you should've talked to her a bit more." Ryland scolded while picking up Kat and placing her on his hip.
"I'm trying to get this done." I replied looking over at Ryland.
"I understand but don't you think you should have some time with (y/n) and the family. We're a family now Shane." Ryland said calmly as he could I know he was frustrated though," Having a family is different. Your supposed to take breaks and spend time with us." He explained
"I get that Ry but I don't have that much time to edit and spend time with you guys. There's only twenty four hours in a day. It goes pretty fast." I explained
"Exactly the days go by fast and so does time in a blink of an eye your kids- our kids will grow up fast and be adults." Ryland exclaimed his voiced raised a bit,"Just talk to her." He said calmly and walked away. He had a point they are going to get older. I got up and went upstairs. I knocked on the (y/n)'s door I heard her sniffling through the other side.
Your P.O.V.
I heard a knock on my door I quickly hid my razor and tried to find a sweater to put over so no one can see what I just did,"(Y/N) can I please come in?" I heard my dad ask.
"Just a second I'm getting dressed!" I called out I went to my closet I couldn't find them.,"I'm coming in (y/n)." He said I heard the door opening,"DAD NO!" I yelled I felt tears prick my eyes I tried hiding near the side of my bed but my dad was already in my room,"(Y/n) I'm sorry I didn't say anything to you..." he paused I noticed he was looking at my arms,"Why...?" He asked I noticed he had tears brimming his eyes. I just broke down in tears. I felt my dad wrap his arms around me and hold me tight. I felt his tears fall on my head,"I'm so sorry dad. I really am." I choked out
"I know I know I'm sorry too.." he said in between sobbing we held each other,"I know I've been caught up in working and I'm sorry..." he said I held him tighter.
"It's ok I should've talked to you before.." I said calming down a bit.
Shane's P.O.V.
I held her I didn't ever her wanting her to feel this way. I feel like I've failed her,"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I repeated,"I've let you down..." we said in unison I slightly broke the hug but I was still holding her. I made her look at me," You did not let me down. I'm your father I should've talked to you and took a break from work. We are all a family now.." I said while hugging her tightly again.
"I should've just told you how I felt.." she said
"You can always talk to me or Ryland. What's been bothering you?" I asked
"I just want us to hang out more." She replied I nodded.
"Okay I'll make time for us." I said
"Also I want to help you edit your videos." She said
"Okay but you have to keep your grades up if you want to help." I said.
"Also dad?" She said I hummed as an answer," What if I really was changing and you busted in. I could've really been changing." She said.
" I heard you crying and when you answered your voice sounded different." I replied," Just know I'm here for you. I always am." I said while kissing the top of her head.

Heyyyy shippers I hope you enjoyed this chapter again if your dealing with some PLEEAASE talk to someone you trust. You need to be here you wouldn't be here without a purpose I know you probably won't believe it rn. I understand but just know that there are people who love you. I love you guys take care byyye 💕💕💕💕💕😘😘😘😘😘