Normal //Ryan Metzger

07.5: nice to meet you

We sat in what felt like the longest silence I've ever encountered.
"Lauren, it's okay," He said rubbing my shoulder with his thumb. Our foreheads were touching as we still continued to sit in the hardwood floor.
"You're so amazing, Ryan," I whispered. "I just know I'll ruin whatever chance I have of staying in your life."
"Are you afraid of commitment?" He asked is a non demeaning tone.
I shook my head.
"I'm afraid of losing you," I said looking up to him. "I'm afraid of losing someone that I love so much."
"I'm not going anywhere, Lo," He smiled, wiping my cheek with his thumb. "I'm right here always."
"You say that but what if my anxiety gets too much to handle? What if you want kids one day? W-What if-"
"What if's aren't a thing," he said. "It's the now's that count."
"I'm just so fearful of my future and where it's going because ever since that night, my whole plans were destroyed within a matter of an hour," I said. "God, I feel like all I do is whine to you."
"You don't whine," he said lifting my chin to get his glance. "You laugh at my corny jokes all the time, you listen when I need to get something off of my chest, you outplay me in our video games we play. Lauren, you do not just whine. You are more than just your anxiety.
You are a person. A living, breathing person with so much love in your heart that you're afraid to dish out. I get it, Lo. But saying I will run away because your anxiety is 'too much' is like saying I will run away because you become too much, and that'll never happen Lauren."
"I'm just scared, is all," I said with a single tear escaping from my left eye. "I'm scared to trust anyone again like I trusted my ex. I'm scared to give someone that trust and it be shoved in my face and my thoughts telling me it was all my fault."
He gave me a look of sadness that broke my heart a little bit. He looked helpless, as if he was doing enough, but in reality he was doing way more.
"Ohio, you deserve love. You deserve to live your life to the fullest. You are 24 years old and have so many years ahead of you, you have no idea," He let out a little laugh. "There are many ways to get your future to where you want it to be and I want to be there for you through it. I don't care if I'm there as your husband or your man of honor at your wedding, but I'll be there."
I let out a laugh of relief and connected my forehead with his again, both of us smiling.
"The world needs more Ryan Met's in this life," I said to him. He cracked an even bigger smile.
*
   We finished what was left on the "tour to-do" list and headed out to the studio where we'd meet up with Adam, Jack, and people on their team.
   Ryan drove since it was a little ways out of the city. I grabbed Ryan's dad hat that was on the rear view mirror and slid it over my wavy curls.
  "So you've never heard our music?" He asked turning out of the city.
  "Besides what you guys made yesterday, no. I only really listen to-"
  "Lemme guess," he said smiling. "Country."
   "Wow, stereotyping already?" I said with a dropped jaw and a smile. "Not everyone in Ohio sprouted from a corn stalk at birth and drove tractors to school, y'know."
  He busted out laughing which was always contagious to me.
   "No, I usually listen to whatever someone suggests," I said. Ryan plugged his phone into the aux and shuffled through his music. He pressed a purple album and hit shuffle.
   "This is the album we are touring with right now," he said as a metronome sound started throughout the car's speakers. "If I'm gonna be your man of honor, you gotta love my music."
   I laughed and listened to the songs as he drove down the roads, soaking in every minute that played. To my shock, the album excelled. I didn't normally attract to this type of music, but there's is..different in a way.
   As we turned a corner, a semi appeared out of no where. Ryan slammed on the brakes and flung his arm over my chest to stop my body from flying forward.
   The semi passed with a honk as we both heavily breathed out of relief.
   "I'm not a bad driver, I swear," he said, trying to make like of the situation. I let out a nervous laugh and wiped my brow.
   "Jesus, Metzger. Kill us why don't you," I laughed as he continued to drive.
   We pulled up into a building and parked in one of the spots closest to the building's doors. Ryan and I climbed out of the car and into the building.
   Jack and Adam were fidgeting with a sound board while a guy tuned a guitar in the corner and another fingered his trumpet.
   "So what exactly are you guys doing?" I asked, confused at the scene.
   "Setting up tracks, making sure the sample board is programmed, lighting, all that jazz," He said shrugging.
   "Is that the Ryan Metzger I see?" A female, around our age, said as she walked up to us.
   She was a very petite woman, with long blonde hair and style to no end. Her Vera outfit outblasted Ryan's Columbia sweatshirt and dirty leggings with my hair half up in a clip with his hat. I realized I was wearing more of Ryan's clothes than my own.
   "Oh my gosh, Natalie!" Ryan said, practically lighting up like a Christmas tree when she came into view. "I've missed you so much."
   They hugged, almost for a very awkward time, and then Ryan realized I was still in the room.
   "Oh, uh-Natalie this is my friend Lauren. She just moved here from Ohio."
    "Ooh a girl with some country roots, love that," she said and her and Ryan laughed. I didn't.
   "Yeah, I grew up in Columbus, y'know, away from the cowboys and corn," I said giving her a smile that I tried to play off.
   Natalie gave Ryan a confused look and he frantically tried to save the conversation from turning awkward.
  "Okay, well I'm gonna go set up the sample board," Ryan said and flashed us a smile before taking to the board that another guy was plugging into a computer.
   "Isn't Ryan such a sweetheart?" She asked, admiring him from where we stood. I looked up at her, her almost being the same height as Ryan making her way taller than me. "Any girl would be lucky to have him, don't you think?"
   "Yeah," I said giving her a look she never saw because she was staring in his direction. "I'm gonna go sit with Jack now."
   I left Natalie and joined Jack at the couch across the room. Adam has been whisked away buy a sound producer for his bass.
   "Sup Lo," Jack said, moving the acoustic guitar so I could sit. "What's up your ass?"
   "Who is that Natalie girl?" I asked, staring at her staring at Ryan.
   "Oh Nat? She's one of the roadie's daughters we had last tour. I guess her dad is doing it again this year," he answered, shrugging it off. "She always tried to get with us and it was super weird."
Did you hear that? My thoughts said to me. She tried to get with them. Ryan's face lit up when she walked in. She will be with them for the next month and a half and you will be stuck in New York.
  "Crazy," I said quietly, responding to Jack. "She looks like a bitch."
   "Oh she is, trust me," He laughed and fumbled with the guitar strings in front of him.
As time went on, Jack left the couch and I watched Ryan from across the room, giggling at him getting frustrated at the sound board.
"Okay everyone," Adam said over the crowd. "I need something to post on the Instagram for fans."
Adam went over to Ryan and the sound producer guy and started recording them fidgeting with the different sounds that were familiar to the songs Ryan played in the car. I was trying to decipher the beats, picking them from each song when Adam panned the camera over to me quickly before ending the video.
"Thanks guys," he said and everyone in the room continued their work. Within seconds, I got a notification on my Instagram that @ajrbrothers tagged me in a video on their Instagram page.
I watched the video of Ryan and the sound guy fumbling with the buttons and the camera panning over to me, staring at Ryan. Adam had captioned it:
Can't wait for the tour. I can tell @lo.pearson is excited to watch Ryan this tour.
I laughed and gave the video a like and followed their page. To my surprise, the three of them had close to 200k followers. I followed each of the brothers, both with numbers following that.
As I sat there, random people continued to follow me and commenting on the post.
"Aren't we all excited to watch him?"
"Is she wearing his hat and his sweatshirt?"
"This Tour is gonna be amazing! Only 7 days!"
"We stan Ryan."
"Who is she?"
I laughed at some of them, but the ones speculating our relationship scared me a little and I wondered if the follows I was getting was not because I knew AJR, but because they were trying to put the pieces together of a puzzle I didn't want them to figure out.
"Oh my gosh Lauren, that video was funny," Natalie said, sitting on the seat beside me, almost on top of my feet that were laying across it. "Are you excited to kick the tour off in London?"
"London? As in England?" I asked confused.
"Yeah that's the first stop," she said smiling. "You've got a passport, right?"
"I'm not actually going on the tour. Ryan and I have only known each other for two months."
"Bummer!" She said in a very fake tone that was easy to detect. "Ryan will be in good hands, don't you worry little girl."
I gave her a confused look, furrowing my brow.
I'm fucking 24, I said to myself but not out loud.
I couldn't stop thinking of Ryan being so far away like London. The thought scared me. I was so used to him only being a quick walk down a few blocks, but now the thousands of miles grew my fear.
"Hey," Ryan said walking over to us. "You two becoming friends?"
"The bestest!" She said laughing. Ryan looked at me and I forced myself to smile, showing him I was not having fun.
"Good," He said, setting up himself to give and excuse. "Nat your dad needs all you roadies to set up bunk orders for the bus."
Natalie got up from her seat and pecked Ryan on the cheek.
"The tour would fall apart without you," She said and walked out of the room.
"Okay," I said once she was out of earshot. "What the fuck?"
"What?" He asked.
"That is the most fake I've ever seen someone act."
"Nat takes some getting used to. Trust me, you guys will become close."
"Close enough for her to kiss my cheek too?" I said under my breath so he couldn't hear me. "You guys are going to London?"
"Yeah! Isn't that exciting? We love shows over there."
"Yeah it is," I said smiling. "I'm just-" I hesitated saying my next words, and changed them at the last second. "really happy for you guys."
"Aw Lo," He said leaning down to give me a hug. "You're the best number one fan."
"You know it," I said, hugging him back.

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-okay so obviously some real life facts are gonna be altered a little for the sake of the fan fic. I mean, it is fiction.
-chapter song is overture from the click