Walking Sins (BoyxBoy)

The Truth Sucks

Hello, wonderful, amazing, magnificent people, this is a chapter, so get excited

Erik was leaning against the headboard of his bed, I was next to him, shoulders touching as we lean heavily on one another. He was reading and I was still reeling in shock from today's events. Really I was in disbelief.

Some part of me was irritated that I hadn't realized just how gay Erik really was. The remaining part of me was still expecting Erik to jump out and scream 'Sike!'. Still, I figured I would allow myself to indulge in this moment, even if it were just a joke.

For now, Erik liked me. He liked me back. We had kissed and we had confessed and I felt like I was on top of the world. I shifted my head, looking up at him as he tilted his head down.

"So, how does one get away with being a gay committee member?"

Erik's eyebrow quirks as he locks his phone, an array of emotions flickering in his eyes as he leans against the headboard and sighs. "With a lot of dismissal."

"You are gay, right? One-hundred percent?" After all, the scene in the bathroom was fairly impromptu, and even if Erik had admitted to being gay, I felt I needed to hear him say it. Hell, he still might be into chicks for all I knew.

He frowned, looking distantly at the wall. "I was definitely aware that I was different when I was younger, as far as realization came to me being gay... well, I didn't accept it for a long time." Erik grimaced, "I think some part of me won't ever accept it."

The words made my gut pinch uncomfortably, "What do you mean?" I ask hesitantly, words drawn out. I liked Erik a lot, I did, perhaps even hold deeper feelings then that - not that I would admit them . I didn't want to get hurt though. I knew that with Erik being my boyfriend (that fact still made my stomach jump) things would need to be kept in the shadows of secrecy - especially in a town like this - but I couldn't date someone if they were ashamed of me.

He leaned closer, his head slouching over mine. When he spoke his voice was the most solemn I had heard it. "I want to be with you, don't worry about that, but," he swallowed. "One of my earliest memories is sitting on my floor and praying to God in the hopes that he would make me normal." He fiddled with his thumbs. "And I understand and I accept everyone for who they are, but..."

"But you can't accept yourself?"

"Yeah," he spoke, resigned.

"Well," I started, turning my head to look at Erik. "for what it's worth, I'm glad you're not normal. In any sense of the word."

Erik grins at that, even with his eyes still partially distant. Teeth showing, eyes crinkled, and dimples showing, I find myself grinning back. God damn. "I didn't realize you were such a smooth talker."

I laugh, "No, I've been catching up on crappy, gay romance novels. Has it paid off?" I teased. I don't think I would ever let Erik live down the fact that he reads gay erotica.

"Be quiet." Erik pressed his lips together, trying and hide his smile (his dimples give him away). "They're not all that bad."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Pass your phone, like right now, I promise you they're terrible."

His lips twitch. "...look they aren't all great bestselling stories."

"Phooooonnnnne!" I command, laughing when Erik shakes his head and begrudginly passes it to me. I unlock it, knowing the password for this reason specifically. I scroll through, trying to find a excerpt that isn't purely, well... fucking. "...is there even a story line to this one?"