A Different Divergent: A Better Tomorrow

~eighty-two~

Chapter 82

"Are you sure about this?" he asks, giving me the opportunity to change my mind once again.

"I've never been more certain about anything in my life," I say. He lowers his lips to mine and gives me a tender kiss then pulls away like he just remembered something.

"Do I need to use a condom?" Condom? We've never used them before, and if I'm being completely honest, I really don't want to start now. I like the feel of his skin on mine.

"No ... no condoms," I say. "Isobel said we're covered with the breastfeeding for now."

"Okay," he says. "Are you ready?" Considering I just gave him what I consider to be one hell of an orgasm a few minutes ago, I should be the one asking that question, except I can feel him against my leg, and he's more than ready to go.

"Yeah," I breathlessly say. "I'm more than ready. I'm about to explode."

"I know what you mean, love," he says then he lowers his mouth until it touches mine. I'm concentrating so hard on his lips moving with mine that I don't feel his hand making its way down my body and between my parted thighs until he starts the gentle circular motion on my throbbing nubbin with the calloused pad of his middle finger. I gasp into his open mouth then sigh. It feels so good and very familiar. My hips dance in time with the rhythm he sets and my tongue twirls with his as our kiss deepens.

"Tobias, oh God!" I moan when he very carefully inserts a single finger into my moist center and very slowly thrusts the digit back and forth while circling my nubbin with his thumb. Everything feels the way it did before Peanut. There have been no surprises so far this evening with the exception of not knowing I could want him this badly. "Please, baby. I want you. God, I need you. Please don't make me wait."

He moves his mouth to my ear and says, "Patience, love," then he sticks his tongue in it and twirls it all around, adding to the spectacular fireworks show that's going to go off in a matter of seconds. My hips sway back and forth on his fingers, and I'm not wrong. My whole body tenses, and I experience an explosion of sensation unlike anything I've ever felt before. My hips involuntarily keep time with the ministrations of his fingers until my senses return. When he moves his mouth back to mine, I feel him settle between my outstretched legs, knowing that I'm ready for him. He reaches between us and places himself at my entrance, and then reaches up and cups my face, caressing my cheeks with his thumbs. I rest my hands on his hips while we stare deeply into each other's eyes. "I love you."

"I love you," I say, repeating each word back to him with the respect it was just given to me. I reach up and run my fingertips lightly down his cheek then raise my lips to his. We kiss slowly, softly as we cling to each other. He gently thrusts his hips forward, applying a steady pressure and slips into my body about an inch, and I gasp into his open mouth. Why does he always feel bigger after we've had to wait a while to make love? I moan as he pushes into me a little further, biting down on my bottom lip to keep from calling out. He stills, letting me get used to the stretching and the fullness. I cling to him as I try to figure out how I'm feeling. It's not exactly painful but it's not as comfortable as it was on the train nearly five weeks ago.

"Do we need to stop?" he roughly asks, sensing that my mind is someplace else.

"You just need to go slow," I say, unable to keep the discomfort out of my voice. He stares down at me with a contradiction of feelings in his eyes. "Do you trust me, Tobias?"

"Tell me what's wrong," he firmly says, panic in his voice. I wrap my arms around his neck, pull his mouth to mine, and kiss him deeply.

"Do ... you ... trust ... me?" I breathlessly repeat.