A Different Divergent: A Better Tomorrow

~fourty-eight~

Chapter 48

I know I'm lying in bed teetering on the edge of slumber and wake. I fight hard to fall back into sleep but unfortunately my heavy eyelids flutter open, and I'm greeted by a bright sunny morning. I stretch with a groan and roll over to find my husband staring at me.

"Good morning, love," Tobias says. "Did you sleep well?"

"I did," I groggily say. "You exhausted me last night. I'm not sure if I slept or passed out." We laugh lightly at my little joke.

"I could say the same thing about you," he says with a smirk on his face. After finishing in the kitchen, we made love in the shower and then again in our bedroom. We just couldn't keep our hands off each other, and I'm not sorry one bit. We were long overdue.

"What time is it?" I ask.

"A little after 6:00 a.m.," he says. I listen carefully to the baby monitor but hear nothing out of the ordinary. "She's still asleep." I give him an inquisitive look. "I could tell you were wondering about our girl. I just checked on her right before you woke up."

"Oh," I say, moving closer to him. "That means we have a little time." I pull his mouth to mine and give him a long, lingering kiss. When we part, my head is fuzzy.

"Time for what? You know she'll be up soon," he says.

"Just us time," I say. "You can kiss me some more. I would like that." He smiles then proceeds to make love to my mouth with his talented tongue and lips as he explores my body with his nimble fingers. He is so good at this. I'm such a lucky girl. I still wonder from time to time why it is that he chose me out of all the girls here at Dauntless but I just close my eyes and thank God. I can't even imagine my life without him. We lie with each other, our arms and legs a tangled mess, kissing and groping each other like the horny teenagers we truly are. Quiet whining catches my attention, and I know Tessa is up. Tobias pulls his mouth from mine but doesn't immediately release me.

"I love you, Beatrice Grace," he says, his voice fill of strong emotion. "Thank you for last night. I had a wonderful time. I needed that connection with you. You know it's not just sex with us, it's so much more."

"I love you, too, Tobias," I say. "You're the one who made last night extra special for us. I liked the sundaes and sex in the kitchen, the quickie in the shower, and when you made love to me in our bed so I could look into your eyes. You always give me what I want, what I need." He kisses me again until Tessa really starts crying.

"Sorry," he says as we climb out of bed. I pull my robe over my bareness and go into Tessa's room as Tobias heads into the bathroom for his morning shower.

"Mommy's here, little one," I say. She's in the middle of the crib keening loudly, tears running down her face. My heart aches at the sight, and I mentally beat myself up as I change her diaper for not tending to her sooner. "I'm sorry, Tessa. I hate when you have tears." I sit down in the rocking chair and try to put her to my breast but she just cries louder so I get up and walk with her a little bit, shushing and bouncing her as I go. She calms down a little so I try again and this time she latches onto my nipple easily and suckles vigorously. As I sit and watch her eat, my mind wanders to Peanut and how I'm going to take care of two babies at once. I know I've had these fearful thoughts before and that woman have twins every day but this is a totally different situation. Tessa won't even be six months old when my due date arrives. Suddenly I realize tears are running down my face as panic sets in.

"What's wrong?" Tobias asks, alarm in his voice.

"How am I going to take care of two babies and a toddler?" I blubber almost incoherently. Tessa releases my nipple and looks at us trying to figure out what's wrong. I lift her to my shoulder, and she burps on the second pat.