A Different Divergent: A Better Tomorrow

~fourty-two~

Chapter 42

What's going on around here? First Murphy has a full-fledged nervous breakdown during weapons training, then the bitch goes off the reservation and makes a play for my husband, Faith is accidentally killed during a practice fight, and now one of our initiates has taken their own life by jumping into the chasm. My heart rate picks up in my chest, pounding painfully as it reaches a rapid pace. My breathing becomes shallow and quick, and my eyesight grows dark around the edges. All of a sudden I'm transported back in time one year to when a suffocating feeling overtook me as I watched another initiate pulled out of the chasm.

"Hey, Tris, are you okay?" Will asks, sounding very far away. I can tell everyone is looking at me but I'm not really seeing them.

"Shit," Tobias mutters under his breath. He puts his hands on either side of my face and stares deeply into my eyes. "You've got to calm down, love. Think of Peanut. Breathe with me." He coaxes me into the relaxing deep breathing exercises, and I finally feel a tranquility envelope me. "Are you okay?"

"Sorry, flashback," I murmur, not only embarrassed by my absurd reaction but by the fact that so many witnessed it. "Who jumped, Will? Was it Brody?"

"Actually, I didn't wait around to see who it was," he says. "I left Simon and Tony in charge of getting the body out of the chasm and to the infirmary and came to find all of you." The four of us purposefully walk from the daycare center, across the Pit floor to where a large crowd of Dauntless has gathered by the chasm edge near the railing.

"Back up," Tobias forcefully says using his public Four voice. "Everyone, back up ... now!" The gawkers finally move out of our way just in time for us to see Purple-Hair zip up Sam in the large black body bag. Absentmindedly, I think we must only have one size of body bag here in Dauntless. It was too small for Al but it's entirely too large for her.

"We should have checked on her," I mutter, mainly to myself. We were so focused on Brody that we didn't think twice about what she was going through. "I know she was upset but I didn't know she was this upset."

"Will, do you know where Uriah and Christina are?" Tobias asks.

"We're right here, Four," Uriah says as they push their way through the onlookers, reaching our side. "Who is it?"

"Sam," Tobias says.

"She's the one who fought Faith, right?" Christina asks.

"Yeah," he says.

"Why'd she do it?" she asks. I feel the same irrational annoyance I've been feeling the past couple of days creeping up on me, and I don't want to snap at anyone else, especially my best friend so I take a long, deep cleansing breath.

"I doubt we'll ever know," I say as we watch Purple-Hair and Snake-Tattoo pick up the body bag and carefully move through the throng of people toward the infirmary. "We've got to get to the training room."

"Why don't you four go ahead and continue with the initiates," Tori says, taking charge. "Will and I will accompany the body to the infirmary."

"Sam," I say. "Her name was Sam."

"Of course, Tris. I didn't mean any disrespect," she says.

"We'll do that, Tori," Tobias says. We split up after the crowd finally disperses. Tori and Will head off in the direction of the infirmary while Uriah, Christina, Tobias, and I make our way to the training room. We're all quiet on our walk. I'm worried about having to break the news to the transfers that yet another one of them is gone, and Tobias is preoccupied with his phone, messaging someone I assume. I don't know what's on Uriah or Christina's minds but they're somber, too. Maybe what happened this morning reminded them of Al, too. When we enter the training room, everyone is gathered around talking to one another, transfers mixed with Dauntless-born, except for Brody who is standing off by himself. I notice Ana stealing glances at him from time to time. I didn't see it earlier but I think she likes him.