All Those Years - Taejin

I - Seokjin

🔝Seokjin in a furter chapter(s)🔝

Beautiful, but dark. So close, yet so far. These are my thoughts on Taehyung. So beautiful, yet full of darkness. I can feel him so close, but I know he is too far away.

He left me for the big city to study internationally. God, he didn't even say goodbye. How could I not notice that he was never my friend. I regret having feelings for this guy.

Now I realize, that Taehyung is like painkiller. If you didn't take it enough, it wouldn't help you. If you take enough of it, you feel fine and it helped. But if you take too much...it could just kill you.

Still, even after 8 years, or over 2922 days, I haven't gotten over that. Life has been hard. But most of all, I lost my best friend. Or the love of my life.

I have never understood soulmates. I couldn't understand, how were you supposed to know your soulmate? As I got older, I understood. And now I completely understand. He is my soulmate. I've always felt a strong connection towards him.

Anyways, enough of this sad bullshit. Let's get on with this.

—
~8 Years Ago~

It was actually raining after a long while. I wondered why. The sky was tinted black with not a hint of light in the morning sky. It's...depressing, at the very least. And yesterday the sun was beaming so hard in our eyes, what's happened?

It was weird when I got to school. TaeTae wasn't sitting at our table. This is really unusual. He is ALWAYS here, when I arrive. I just ignored it, maybe he just got sick? Yeah, I think that's the case.

Me and Taehyung already met when we were just newborn babies, since we were neighbors (they are the same age in this story, don't mind). Our parents would meet every weekend for coffee, so they took me with them.

We got along well. I played many things with him. Once we grew older, we would play more grown up games. We were really close and couldn't be separated. We even went to the same kindergarten and after that, to the same school.

Every teacher at kindergarten and school saw, how close we actually were. I once even heard one teacher talking to the other about me and Tae being soulmates. I didn't understand it back then so well, so I just ignored it.

I sat down and looked at the empty seat beside me. I would always feel lonely when he was not here. And he didn't get sick a lot, so I was confused.

Our first lesson started, which was mathematics. I was always a smart and logical kid, so mathematics was one of my favourite lessons, and also because I always understood it so well. I was always the first one to finish my work in the class, so teachers were impressed.

~After school~

As school ended, I rushed out of the school, not looking back. It was always the case when Tae was absent, but that time, it felt more serious. The teachers didn't even mention or notice Taehyung's absence.

I ran to TaeTae's house and looked at it. The car was missing. I opened the gate and closed it behind myself. I slowly walked to the door and lightly knocked on it. I waited for a little while but no one came. I knocked a bit harder. Still, no answer.

I grabbed the door handle and pressed it down. I pulled, but it was locked. I was so confused. Where could he go?

I went to the gate and exited the property. I then ran to my own house and opened the door. My parents greeted me as they heard my arrival. I went to the kitchen and sat down around the table.

My mother also sat down across from me and asked, how was school. I said it was fine, but also mentioned, that Taehyung was not present and also the story about going to his house and him not being there.

My mother closed her eyes and took my hands over the table. "Taehyung...left for America, since his parents found a job there." I sat still for a moment, soaking all of it in. "But...but that means he didn't even bother to say goodbye to me? His best friend?" My mom shook her head. "They left early this morning. I don't know why he didn't say anything to you before leaving." I was sad, yes, but most of all, I was angry and Taehyung for not saying anything to me before leaving.

I stood up, grabbed my backpack and ran upstairs to my room. It was Friday so there was no school tomorrow. I usually did my homework on Saturday mornings, so I had time.

I threw my backpack in the corner of my room and plopped on my bed. The next moment, I started crying. Hard. I was sad, angry and confused. I was sad, because he had left. I was angry, because he hadn't said goodbye. I was confused, because of my feelings towards him.

This night, I couldn't sleep properly. I was thinking too much to function normally. My mind was filled with Tae. I couldn't stop thinking about him. I was just thinking about his cute baby face. Eventually I fell asleep, with the thought of him in my head.

A/N:
So, it's been a while since I'd written anything that long, so I hope you enjoyed it! I would love to continue this story, because I have a lot of motivation and inspiration at this point, so you can also let me know, how you feel about this.

Until then, have a nice day!

~Author