NO ANGEL ★彡 S. MENDES

𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍.

eleanor anne kavinsky.

at two o'clock that same day, when shawn's stomach started to loudly rumble, the four of them decided to go get lunch. "i'm going to go out for lunch. don't get me wrong, this place is lovely but i need to clear my head," eleanor said getting up and grabbing her bag as scott and teddy nodded.

"i'll come with you," shawn said, standing up immediately after her.

eleanor ignored him and walked out the door but left it open for him. making her way down the steps of the building and onto the beach, she untangled her headphones and looked through her spotify until she found syre by jaden smith and let the angelic voice at the beginning of 'b' fill her ears and she automatically relaxed and felt a little of the tension from her shoulders disappear. well, that was until she felt an unfamiliar feeling of a large hand slipping into her own. she reflexed quickly and tensed at the strange touch but relaxed (only by the smallest amount) when she saw that it was only shawn.

"hey," he smiled at her, squeezing her hand a little as they walked along the beach and neared the road.

eleanor pulled her headphones out of her ears as she started to see people and tried to pull her hand away from shawn's, but unlucky for her, his grip was strong so her hand remained tightly in his warm grasp. "why are you holding my hand?" she asked, looking at him and ignoring his greeting.

shawn frowned at her question but nevertheless responded while awkwardly chuckling, "sometimes all a person wants to do is hold your hand."

at his comment, eleanor looked down at her feet as she walked forward and glanced at his own. "why are you wearing black boots on the beach?" she couldn't help but ask.

"style," he smirked, looking up at her and using his free hand to push one of his curls out of his face.

the two walked down the street a bit, eleanor and shawn's sunglasses and caps managing to keep them from being recognised, allowing them to be able to breathe and go about their business. "i might just get a sandwich from starbucks. what are you going to get?" eleanor asked, looking around the street.

"sounds good," shawn agreed as the pair walked inside and eleanor found the chance to take her hand out of shawn's as she went to go order.

shawn stood at the back of the store as eleanor went to the counter (luckily there was no line) and as she spoke to the barista and gave her name (lauren - the name of the first girl she remembered having a crush on) and as she did, shawn watched her. not in the creepy or perverted way most other men did, but more in a curious and adoring way. he couldn't really take his eyes off her, to be honest. he watched her push her hair to her side when she spoke gently to the barista as she kept looking up and down between the menu above and her wallet. she looked back at him and that snapped him out of his daydream as she asked, "peter, want do you want?"

"um, i," he tried to think, forgetting his usual order, "whatever you're having."

"another double shot of espresso please," she said quietly the paying for the order.

when eleanor had paid, she came back to stand next to shawn and immediately took her hand in his own and held it tightly, his own large hand encasing her smaller, rougher one. he brought it up to his lips and pressed a small but sweet kissed her knuckles while she stared at him with a blank facial expression. "lauren?" the barista called and she pulled her hand away from shawn's lips as she collected the cups and shoved one is shawn's hand and walked away from him, leaving him alone in starbucks while someone shouted, "is that shawn mendes?"

†

eleanor walked along the beach slowly, taking in the sounds of the tide going back and forth and the the feeling of the soft sand on her feet while her black vans were in her hand and her empty coffee cup in the other. she found a bin near a small hut and bench and tossed away her cup and sat down on the bench and put her shoes right beside her. she took her bag off her shoulder and threw her phone inside and ruffled through until she found her box of pre-rolled blunts and picked one out and found a lighter and lit. eleanor placed it in her mouth and took a puff and breathed out the smoke that satisfied her oh, so much.

eleanor stared at the ocean and took another puff. the cool blue sky seemed to go on forever, meeting the deep blue sea in the horizon as if to say all things must come to end and unlike most people, that comforted eleanor. 'it's almost over. it doesn't matter anymore," she thought to herself. it was rather disturbing in a way, but knowing eleanor, it seemed like the calmer and more rational way to think.

"eleanor? i mean, uh - lauren?" a voice called to her left.

eleanor looked in that direction to see shawn running down the beach, his shoes wobbling as he held them by the laces while he ran with this black sunglasses bobbing up and down his head.

"peter?" she said loudly.

in a few seconds, shawn slowed down so that he could sit next to her and when he did, he took the sunglasses off of his head and put them in his pocket and put his shoes on the bench as well. "nice of you to leave me," shawn said dryly, not meaning anything bitter.

"sorry, i just wanted to get to the beach," she paused, "do you smoke?"

she offered him her blunt and instead of saying anything he just took it off her and took a puff. "this tastes expensive," he said after a moment of silence.

"that's because it is," eleanor smiled at her hands.

the drugs were definitely kicking in. and when they did, she either got unexplainably happy or incredibly sad and angry. either way, she got extremely emotional and very honest. and although she was high above the clouds, there was still a small part of her brain telling her to run while the rest of her was drinking champagne and laughing at her lowest moments. 

"you're pretty," she said out of the blue, "very pretty."

what the fuck eleanor.

"you think?" shawn meekly smiled at her.

"very," she repeated.

"well, i think you're gorgeous eleanor."

"thank you."

silence.

"am i a good kisser?" eleanor asked, taking the blunt from shawn and smoking again.

"yeah. you're good," shawn said, recalling the moment where he grabbed her and kissed her on stage in toronto and blushed beet red.

"only good?" eleanor teased, a smile playing on her lips.

"you're an amazing kisser eleanor kavinsky," he said honestly.

"would you kiss me again?" eleanor asked.

shawn stuttered and stumbled over his words, unsure of what to say. he knew what he wanted but did she? "i - um, uh-"

eleanor cut him off by pressing her soft lips to his and leaving them there long enough for him to taste the marijuana on her lips and then pulled away.

"i'll see you later, shawn."

she always left her hanging and boy, did he love it.

a/n - it's been so long since i've been to starbucks so i lowkey forgot about what people buy from there apart from coffee lmao rip also shall i tell you what's fucking awesome? i put this all in a word counter (not inc. author's notes etc.) and so far i've written 19, 649 words and 107, 331 characters and 5% (239 mentions) of my words are just 'shawn.'