NO ANGEL ★彡 S. MENDES

𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐓𝐖𝐎.

eleanor anne kavinsky.

eleanor still couldn't believe it. she was walking side by side with grace michaels after three years of not speaking to each other. she didn't know exactly how to feel at that moment but she was currently torn between finding the nearest chair and throwing it at her and breaking down into tears and begging her to love her again. but alas she did the smart option: nothing.

"so," grace finally spoke, "your birthday, are you doing anything? i remember you always hated having your birthday right before christmas. remember once when we were kids and your mother forgot about your birthday because she was so busy stressing about christmas and all that jazz so on christmas day when you finally told her that she forgot all about your birthday and she stuck a candle in the turkey? i always figured that that would be me as a mother."

eleanor softly smiled at the memory, recalling going unto her mother who was drinking wine with her aunt with tears rolling down her cheeks and telling her about how she had missed her sixth birthday ("but mother! you only turn six once!")

"i didn't think you'd remember," eleanor admitted, lightly blushing as she smiled.

"how could i forget?" grace spoke softly and eleanor almost stop, "anyway, your birthday is two weeks. surely you've got plans?"

eleanor shook her head. "i might just have a small birthday. just me and a couple of friends. nothing too big and extravagant."

"you haven't changed at all, have you?" grace said, stopping to look at her.

eleanor looked at her in return, staring into grace's honey eyes.

if only she knew.

but she didn't.

"i guess not," eleanor effortlessly lied, something she got good at while she was with grace all those years ago.

"damn, it's like three years never passed," grace laughed, her lips stretching into the smile eleanor had fallen in love so long ago.

"yeah..." eleanor awkwardly laughed.

the two walked together in silence for a few minutes until grace noticed a small cafe on a side road. "hey, that looks cute and a little quiet. want to go inside?" grace proposed.

no, was what eleanor wanted to say but before she could stop herself she was agreeing to grace's proposal and they walked down the street to the cafe, eleanor's eyes trying not to land on grace. when they reached the door, grace pushed open the door and held it open for grace. charming. grace went upto the counter and spoke to the waitress at the front. speaking fluent japanese to the waitress, grace put on her billion dollar smile and laughed at whatever the waitress said and passed her some change and eleanor couldn't help but feel a pit at the bottom of her stomach.

grace walked away and sat down at a table next to the wall, "i hope you still like mochas," she laughed.

"no, i don't drink them as much anymore. i normally just get espresso shots or black coffee," eleanor said quietly.

"so, i guess things have changed," grace laughed, "you look more beautiful than the last time i saw you. face to face, i mean. i see you everywhere now. on the billboards, the magazines, i can't escape you! but the pictures never look as good as the real thing."

eleanor couldn't help but blush and softly smiled, "it's been the other way around for me. i haven't heard about you since..." she trailed off and her smile faded.

"yeah, that. look, i'm sorry about that. you were sixteen, i was seventeen. we were both so young. i shouldn't have got your hopes up and then moved us both to new york and then just, uh, you know. left you. i made a mistake. and for that, i'm sorry," grace apologised sincerely.

eleanor resisted the feeling to jump up and scream at grace, ask about if she was sorry for all the other stuff she did to her. if she was sorry for eleanor wanting to kill herself because she thought she would never be good enough for her. but eleanor bet she wasn't. but she kept herself calm and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

"it's okay," eleanor lied, shaking her head, "everything happens for a reason right?"

"yeah, and i listened to one of your songs the other day. summertime sadness? but not the shitty remix version," grace chuckled, "the original - it's beautiful by the way - and one of the lyrics really spoke to me. 'kiss me hard before you go... i just wanted you to know that baby you're the best' and all about the stuff about living fast and dying young. i loved it - wait, i love it. it made a lot of sense to me and then i got the thought: i needed to see you again. then for about a month, i tried tracking you down but all i got were missed calls and unread text messages until one day i sent you that voicemail and you replied and then i realised... i would get to see you again. that was all i ever wanted. i missed you, a lot. it may not seem like it... but that's how i felt the moment i met you. and i just wanted to ask you, uh - would you let me back into your life? you know? for old times?"

eleanor was silent. she had absolutely no idea of what to say and was left in shock. but she found an excuse to do something when her phone started ringing and she briefly left the table to answer it.

"eleanor, you've been ages. where are you? i finally got the keys for our room," said the annoyed voice of chris.

"i'm sorry! i'm sorry! i'm just out with..." eleanor quickly glanced at grace while trying to figure out what to say, "an old friend who i bumped into and really wanted to see me. i hadn't seen her in three days and i wanted to see-"

"okay i got it, but you need to come back now. you're front row at that fashion show tomorrow and you needed to be fitted for something," chris sighed.

"okay bye," eleanor said and then hung up.

she turned towards grace and then said, "sorry but my manager needs me at my hotel right now, i-"

"i got you. being you must be busy," she teased, "i'll walk you back."

as they exited the hotel, grace grabbed eleanor's hand and held it in her own. her hand was just as soft as eleanor remembered it but it was freezing cold because of the weather and not even her hot drink had warmed her icy hands. grace smiled at her when she looked at their hands and eleanor returned it as they walked in silence back to their hotel.

the security guard at the doors of her hotel recognised them and nodded as they pushed the doors open and they walked into the lobby. they walked into the centre of the room and surprisingly, it was all empty. grace looked around and let go of eleanor's hands.

"can i kiss you?" she asked.

eleanor was immediately taken aback and stumbled over her next words, "um, i, uh - i guess," and two leaned in slowly and it was only when their lips touched for a split-second when they were forced apart.

"eleanor?!" shouted, shawn?

eleanor couldn't see it, but shawn's heart had just crumbled into a million pieces as he thought about he just lost his girl.

a/n - vote and comment if you enjoyed because the comments you guys leave me honestly make my day <3 and i just realised that i went off my planned timing and i'm pissed because none of the dates make sense and i need to spend ages re planning everything.