Our Journey To Happy Endings

Bittersweet

Date published: February 11, 2014 | Date edited: March 29, 2014 | Published again today: August 18, 2014

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There's nothing special with this day after all. It's just one of those days.

~AquilaAndromeda~

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bittersweet

"Sammy, Valentine party natin mamaya. Wag kang mawawala ha?" I heard her playing with her car keys habang nakasandal sa pinto ng kwarto ko.

"Of course. I wouldn't miss it for anything." Hindi na ako nag-abalang tingalain pa si Borj. I kept my eyes on my work. Bago ang Valentine party ng barkada, I have to attend to my school works. These plates are due tomorrow.

"Okay then. Alis na ko. See you mamaya."

I heard her close the door behind me. When I was sure she's gone, inilapag ko ang lapis na gamit ko na napupudpod na kaka-drawing ko nang ilang oras sa mesa. I rested my head on my desk and breathed heavily.

Valentine party. Sure, that would be fun.

Ipinikit ko saglit ang mga mata ko. Saka ko lang naramdaman ang pagod nang wala pang isang minuto na nakapikit ako, nakaramdam na ako ng antok. Gah, I never felt so drained. Pero bago pa ako makatulog, dumilat na ako at nagpatuloy sa pag-draw.

I have been in front of these white sheets of paper for the past five hours. Hindi ko magawang sukuan ang bagay na ito dahil ito ang kaisa-isahang requirement samin ni Prof. Cruz para makapasa sa Pre-Finals.

Few minutes more, I told myself. Malapit na din naman akong matapos. After nito, magpapahinga lang ako saglit at magpi-prepare na para sa get together naming magkakaibigan.

"Sammy, 7:30 sunduin kita dyan sa inyo." - A message I received from Borj. Sinisiguro nya talaga na pupunta ako. I replied a simple 'okay'. That would be enough para malaman nya na hindi ako tatakas.

No, not this time.

I have been avoiding this day for the past years at nakakapagod na ring umiwas sa barkada dahil sa kanya - dahil sa isang rason na hindi worth it. I am neglecting my good friends dahil sa iisang tao and that's a little unfair. Realized that just recently and I feel like a fool for dwelling on his memories.

Tinanggal ko ang tuwalya na nakapulupot sa mahaba kong buhok at tumapat sa electric fan para patuyuin ito. 6:45 na. I have 45 minutes to contemplate on everything. I don't know what's going to happen today but I am prepared for anything.

At 7:15, nag-aantay na ako kay Borj sa baba ng bahay.

I constantly reminded myself to consider this day a normal day, just like other days na magiipun-ipon ang barkada. There's nothing special with this day after all. It's just one of those days.

Oo, madami ang tuwang-tuwa makatanggap ng chocolates, flowers, teddy bears, and all those cheesy stuff sa araw na to. But all I want is freedom from all that.

It's not that those things never made me jump for joy or caused my cheeks to blush. It's just not my thing anymore. I've moved on from that teenage phase where chocolates make your day and flowers make you feel special. None of those stuff mean anything if they would just remind you of all things painful and heartbreaking a few years after.

Five minutes before the set time, dumating si Borj. I unenthusiastically hopped in her car. Inaantok na ako dahil sa pagpupuyat ko for my plates.

"Ganda natin ngayon ah?" she said with a tone half-complimenting and half-amused. I smiled. Kahit papaano nag-ayos din ako. "Nga pala, Sammy, dadaanan muna natin sila Lyka. Sira daw kotse ni Ivan," she informed me as I made myself comfortable on the backseat.