Hidden Inside (A Poem Book) (On Hold)

Lost Happiness

I failed to find the happiness next to me
Each turn I took
Filled with light
But I found the dark
It never left me
I couldn't stop it
The happiness was lost
It was lost inside of me
I couldn't smile anymore
I couldn't laugh
No one beside me
No friends
No one to call family
Forced smiles here and there
Fake laughs
Real tears hidden underneath
Broken pieces inside of me
Hidden shadows
Of light somewhere
I can't find them
Lost and tucked away
I'm failing here
No passing home
No place called home
Each smile that's real
All sad smiles
So much happiness around me
Failing to catch it
Dropping it and leaving it
Behind
I stood somewhere
Where I couldn't see
Any light
They said it would get better
Said they were by my side
And ran away
Making it worse than before
Even more lost
I felt away
A shadowy figure
Cast behind the curtains
Never to be open
Everyone I thought was important
Coming and stabbing me
Leaving me behind
In hard times
They laughed
And played jokes
Taunting and teasing at me
I smiled a fake smile
Laughed a fake laugh
And went along with them
Knowing they weren't real
I let the sadness come over me
Slowly letting myself open
Not much
But an opening
I felt a presence of guilt
Of never passing
Always failing
How did they find happiness?
There was never any left for me
There own selfish lives
Not caring about others
I let them
I couldn't do anything
It was me after all
Who failed to find happiness
Where was that lost happiness?

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Hey readers!!! How are you guys? Thoughts?
Anything exciting? Christmas is almost here. So is the new year. So excited but not at the same time. Ahhh.....