Heartbroken [Completed] [Wattys 2019]

16

*Nico

We arrived at the mall in one piece despite Percy's terrible driving. And my ears still seemed to work despite his awful singing.

As soon as we stepped foot in the crowded building, Percy grabbed my hand and dragged me into the nearest clothing store, not even giving me time to see what it was. Despite being away from the crowd, Percy sill held onto my hand.

He turned to me and said, "okay, pick out whatever you see that you like and I'll pick some stuff that I think you'll look good in and then you'll try it on. Deal?"

I nodded then started walking around the store, grabbing any clothing that appealed to me. Which constituted mostly of black but there were some other colors too. And I don't mean just gray (although I have some). I had a couple blues and greens and even some red, which was out is character.

After picking up some jeans that looked like they might fit, I went to find Percy. Surprisingly, he didn't have many clothes for me to try on. He put back the ones I said an immediate no to and then showed me the rest. He had a hoodie with a weird checkmark symbol, a pair of jeans that looked uncomfortably tight, and a pair of shoes I fell in love with. Black high top "vans" was what Percy called them.

We hurried over to the dressing room. Percy sat outside while i went and changed. I tried on different shirts, sorting them into 2 piles- "keep" and "no, what the hell". Percy didn't have much of an opinion on them but I could tell he liked the brighter colored ones. He even told me that green suited me.

*Percy

Ever since i made the decision to go for it, my whole view of Nico changed. Instead of seeing him as someone i need to keep a distance from, I've imagined us close. I tried to tell him how i felt with my eyes but i don't think he got it.

When Nico stated that he was going to try on the pants, i got excited. I mean, it was basically a free opportunity to look at his butt- don't judge me. Especially with the pair of skinny jeans i picked out for him.

He came out wearing the ones he picked out. They looked nice on him but that didn't dull my excitement for the last pair.

When he finally came out with them on- wow. Like WOW. They fit him perfectly. Nico seemed kind of hesitant about them at first but i tried to reassure him they looked great. Eventually, seeing how i looked at him, Nico agreed to get them.

After quickly trying on the Vans, we were ready to check out. Nico had gotten 4 shirts, half of them black and half colored, 2 pairs of jeans, including the ones i picked out, the shoes, and, as were heading to the register, some socks and boxers.

The ride home was relatively silent. Not an awkward silence but a comfortable one. Until Nico broke it with a mildly uncomfortable question.

"Why have you been looking at me like that all day?" So he had noticed. I, however, decided to play dumb.

"Like what?"

"Almost... lustful, i guess. That's the only word i can think of to describe it."

I thought out my answer a little before responding. "I guess because that's just how I've been feeling. I'm a teenage boy, it's not really anything weird. And since we kissed, you were just the one i thought to direct it towards... Sorry, I'll try to stop."

"No!" Nico was quick to answer. "No, you don't have to stop. I just wanted to know." He blushed all the way up to his ears, making freckles very noticable on his nose. If i wasn't mistaken, a similar glint had also entered his eyes.

With out warning, at a red light, Nico leaned over and kissed me. It was a peck but it wasn't super intense either. More reassuring, telling me he felt the same way. A smile crossed my face as he kissed me again.

The light turned green, forcing my eyes back to the road. Nico had somehow managed to blush even more, although he was also smiling.

We arrived at my apartment just a few minutes later. I helped Nico carry his stuff in.

As we got closer, i felt adrenaline rush through my veins. I knew Gabe was gone... but was he? He'd been there my whole life, there's no way he's gone.

My breathing got shallower and faster with every step. By the time we wers on my floor, i was shaking and couldn't produce a complete thought.

Nico turned to look at me, catching me as i stumbled. "Percy! Percy, what's wrong?" I shook my head, i couldn't speak, couldn't hear anymore, couldn't see.

I felt arms around me and struggled. It must be Gabe! I felt the food i had eaten today came up and i collapsed to the floor.

Gabe's here. He's waiting for me. Waiting to kill me. Kill my mom. Soon. My brain was convincing itself that Gabe was back. And with that belief came all the things he called me: useless, faggot, mistake, worthless, unwanted, unloved, murderer.

No, i heard quietly from the back of my thoughts. Gabe's gone. Nico got rid of him. The voice got louder until i couldn't ignore it. It was right, Gabe was gone.

I woke and sat straight up, gasping for air and sobbing in my bed. I quickly took in my surroundings: Nico sitting next to my bed, holding my hand; my mom sitting on the bed by my fight, fighting to stay awake; darkness outside, signifying I had passed out for over an hour.

Everything came flooding back to me as i calmed down. I flopped back onto my bed. My mom came up and pushed the hair out of my face, murmuring that it was going to be okay, and she would bring me some water.

My mom left the room and i turned my attention to Nico. I started to apologise but he shook his head. "There's nothing to apologise for." We sat in silence for a couple minutes, still holding hands. "I think you should go to the therapist tomorrow."

I nodded, knowing there was no point to argue and that Nico was right. Me and my mom would go to the session i said we would share and then she would take the rest on her own.

With hopes and anxieties about the following day, i fell asleep. Tomorrow...

A/N

Wassssup? Happy new year yall! Im almost at 1k reads!!! Exciting

I also get to go to the tøp concert, which im hella excited for.

Anyway, smut coming soon, probably within the next 2-3 chapters. And i have a bit of a plan for where i want this book to go. Any suggestions?

Hopefully I'll see you all soon. Love ya guys!