~my heart~ (Jeonglix)

Part. 17

Felix POV:

'did he notice me? Did he? What am I gonna do?' I question myself. I don't know why am I so shy about. So what if he saw me looking at him. Where are all my confidence gone? How long am I gonna keep being the shylix? I hate myself. I really hate myself. I wish I could stop this attitude of mine. I can't be awkward with him all the time.

I heard someone say "hey" as I feel my arms was pushed from the side so I turn to look at yedam. He was asking me to lean in so he can whisper to me. I'm not saying I'm taller than him but he just can't reach my ear, so I leaned in for him. "Can we talk? Alone?" I look at him. Questioning. He sound so serious. I don't care talking to him alone as he is my old friend but leaving in the middle of conversation is rude to me. "Sure. But after we've done eating okay?" I make the symbol 'ok' with my hand to him. He nodded as he agree to me. I turn my head back to the conversation.

I shook my head when I heard "I CAN'T" from hyunjin. They're still fighting over this? When can we start to eat...? I questioned myself.

"Now you guys please stop. It's not even a big deal, you can fight as loud and as long as you want but after we eat okay?? The food are getting cooler." Seungmin started to speak up as the four boys doesn't know when to stop bickering. "FOR GOD SAKE THANK YOU SEUNGMIN HYUNG. I've been waiting for someone say it. FOOD ARE IN FRONT OF US. can't we fucking eat it NOW" yedam screamed, folding his hand together as he bowing while seating down. Chan hyung and hanyu laugh at yedam big respond. "I guess you really hungry yea yedam?" Chan hyung ask, still laughing slowly.

"Don't even ask hyung, I can eat you if I can hyung." Yedam glare at Chan hyung. I bet he's really starving. I don't wanna laugh at yedam cause he is scary when angry but.... It's just food. Why can't you just take it boy?

"Okay, okay, fine we'll eat, BUT, I'm still not finish with you two okay.?" Lee know hyung pointing at jisung and hyunjin. "Hyuunngg please don't be angry I can't eat without your help you know right?" Jisung slide his head in Minho hyung arms. "I-" "PLEASE JUST ONE FINE DINNER, ONE" Joonyoung hyung pointing finger symbolise number one as he shout.

"I'll just eat upstairs... At the balcony." I take my food and head to the balcony. I can see this balcony from outside and I bet it have a nice view which is, it is. I can see a city full of light since bambam's hyung residential are in a hilly area.

There's flower on each corner of the balcony. This means bambam hyung did come to decorate his house. I look around before sit. There's table at the edge of the balcony. Only for two people table. I bet he really is gonna live with Chan hyung alone in this super big house.

It's really cold being outside the house. Since it's midnight and the residence is full of big trees. It's really beautiful. The scenery with the moonlight. I wonder if bambam hyung design this house himself cause it's different than others.
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I'm in the middle of enjoying the scenery,,, still not eating. The scenery of the city light in the front and the moonlight above make me didn't switch on any lamp nor eat my food. Luckily I just bought bibimbap so it won't taste so bad even if it's cold.

"It's really cold out here, no wonder you were wearing hoodie hyung." I flinch a bit by that suprise. I know who is it only by the voice. I turn around slowly, seeing jeongin standing at the sliding door with food container on his hand. I bet he didn't eat yet like me.

"Y-yea... it's cold out here. Y-you better wear the s-sweater you bought just now" I point to a plastic bag inside the room that contains our shopping clothes. Jeongin nodded smilingly before get back inside and take out his sweater. He come back to me without putting his sweater on.

"Why aren't you wearing it?" I ask, I point at the sweater but this time my gaze also drop to the sweater. I wanted to avoid jeongin eyes as possible that I can. "How can I wear it with a container in my other hand hyung?" Jeongin put the container on the table then wear his sweater. How can I be so stupid?

I look at him with a blank face. He was going the sit beside me or in front of me to be precisely but I'm facing the city so it's technically beside me. My eyes followed him until he sat. I can't take my eyes off him. My eyes followed all his movements. He raise his sweater sleeve a bit that make I can see his wrist. He open his container but didn't start digging.

"Why aren't you eating?" I ask. "I forgot to bring the chopstick.... Now how am I going to eat?" He put his hand on his head. I found it cute, how he easily get irritated with simple things like that. "Here take mine, I has two of it" I take the one of my chopstick and give it to him. "Why do you have two?" He ask as he take it. I just smile at him. Can't tell him that I take one more for my ramen tomorrow or he won't take it.

We stay silent after that. The scenery was beautiful. The light are very lovely yet romantic. They wind are hitting us strongly sometimes. The atmosphere are warm and calm. I really enjoyed it. The silent make me more comfortable. It's not like an awkward silence but a very comfortable one. I wish daylight won't come.

Jeongin POV:

I was eating while observing the atmosphere between me and Felix hyung. Felix hyung was sitting right in front of me. His hand are on the table, but, his body aren't facing me. It's facing the city. Sometimes little smile graven on his face. I don't know if that smile is for me or the city but I can see that he is comfortable and happy.

While I was eating, I look up to his face again. I saw he was smiling widely with watery eyes. I shocked at that. I quickly turn to the city, 'is there any rode accident that he saw? Is there any funeral that's going on?' I questioning everything to myself.

"Felix hyung? Are you okay?"