Don't Forget

Chapter Ten: For the Love of a Daughter

Six months has past since my family moved to Calabasas. I had started school and seeking treatment for my eating disorder, bipolar, self harm and depression.

"Sabrina what is the reason why you cut?" My therapist Penny asked me

I fidgeted in my seat on the red leather couch. Why did I cut? My parents, my old friends, not understanding who I was and why I was placed here.

"I just do." I answered shrugging my shoulders

I knew she wasn't going to buy my answer to that, she would want me to dig deeper and explain more. She wanted inside my head but she doesn't need to be in my head. No one does, not even myself. I snapped back and saw Penny staring at me waiting to give her a better answer. To be honest there wasn't one.

"I don't want to be here." I said folding my arms

"You need to be here. You need to get better, nothing has changed since you moved her six months ago." Penny said mimicking my motions

I rolled my eyes, like I said again she needs to stop trying to get into my head. She doesn't belong there, my thoughts are my thoughts. No one else's. Not my Mom's, not my Dad's but my own. She wasn't going to get anywhere near my inner most thoughts. She might as well stop now while she has the chance because once you read them there is no turning back. Penny stood up and shut her booklet. She sighs at me and shook her head.

"If you don't start opening up I would have no choice to send you to a psych ward." She said rubbing her temples

She really wants to know. My father is the reason. He doesn't understand me, he is an alcoholic, abuser, psycho and just an god awful man. What is a father? A gentle man who encourages, loves, supports and cares for there children. Not mine. He doesn't do any of it. He acts like I don't exist. I want my old Dad back. He wasn't always like this, he was a great dad up in till Serenity's death. When she died it's like he lost everything, and I believe he did he lost his first born child and his baby girl. Serenity was the light of my parents life, she was had such an amazing spirit and kind to everyone. My dad died when Serenity died. It's like he's hallow, and death right in the eye. The twinkle in his eye is gone now it's just emptiness.

"Sabrina I know your in there somewhere, you need to let me help you." Penny said looking me in the eyes

She wanted to help me, her eyes looked sad. I felt terrible.

"You wanna know, why I cut?"

Penny shook her head yes waiting for my answer, she folded her hands in her lap and stared into my cold eyes.

"My father and not having Demi around."

Penny wrote down my statement, she looked at me eager to continue. I felt my throat tighten up. I dug my nails into the red leather couch.

"My Dad doesn't act like a real father. He's an alcoholic. He blames me for Serenity's death. Serenity was the light in my parents life, I was always pushed aside. When she died my parents blamed me for her passing." I felt my eyes tear up as I told her

My heart sunken deeper into my chest, I haven't told anyone this before not even Demi.

"I'm a mistake, I'm not serenity. I'll never be like her, I'm not her. My Dad hates me because I'm not her, he's seeking treatment for his alcoholism. I just wish my parents saw me, not as a disappointment but as there daughter. I feel like a ghost at school and at home, they don't notice me at home anymore."

Penny looked at me with sincere, she was lost in her thoughts and didn't know what to say.

"Sabrina your not a mistake to your parents. Your parents need to understand your not Serenity you are your own person. You have feelings too. You can do this, don't care about what they think, do what's best for you."