Lost (A Rosewood Chronicle fanfic)

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"You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped"

"You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped"

"You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped"

The words thundered in Lottie's head as she replayed her last memory of Jamie Volk, his defeated, vulnerable expression as he walked away. She watched him and walk away in his gaze of doubt.

"I failed. There's nothing more to it"

Lottie shivered as she stared out of the window of the limousine. She was on her way back to Rosewood. But she didn't feel the same. She felt... empty. Nothing was the same since Jamie had left, and she realised that although she never noticed his silent presence, she couldn't be without it.

"Hey." Ellie's voice broke her thoughts. The dark-haired girl took Lottie's hand in her own, clasping it tight. "We're going to find him. He's going to come back. I promise."

A lone tear trickled down Lottie's cheek. She missed Jamie. The sarcastic, yet reassuring tone of his voice, the cold way he held himself. The warmth that travelled through her when he confessed something to her, like a reward of her hard work.

Ellie's comforting smile as she spoke was cracked. He wasn't coming back, and they both knew it. And yet... they both convinced themselves he would. He had to. They couldn't imagine life without him.

Lottie cracked a smile back. She rarely smiled since Jamie had disappeared.

"The only thing I could ever be truly disappointed in is myself if I lost you. I don't mean you losing your life. I mean I'd be disappointed is I lost you - your character, your unwavering positivity."

She choked back a sob, thinking about all the times she and Jamie spent. At the Summer Ball, at Rosewood, at Tompkins Hall, listening to him pour his heart into the piano.

"I miss him too. Even if we always used to fight." Ellie said, as if reading her thoughts. Lottie couldn't imagine what she was going through; Ellie and Jamie had spent their whole lives together.

The two girls' grip on each other tightened, as if they afraid if they let go, they'd lose each other too.

The Princess and her Portman locked eyes, Ellie's dark stormy orbs looking lost, Lottie's shining blue eyes losing their sparkle.

"Your Majesty, we have arrived."

The girls looked up to see the chauffeur holding the door open for them. Ellie gave her Portman's hand one last squeeze, before getting out the car. Lottie wiped the tears away from her cheeks, and got out of the car.

She felt a rush of relief as she took in the smell of roses. She was home.

She clasped Ellie's hand and rushed though the gates, not minding if anyone saw. Ellie laughed in surprise, running along the footpath.

They stopped in front of the main doors, looking at the clusters of students, yellow, red and purple uniforms dotted around the courtyard.

"Lottie! Ellie!" The two girl drew their attention to a small girl with black curls. Binah rushed up to them, hugging them both. "I heard what happened. Are you ok?" She asked, once she let go.

Ellie and Lottie shared a sad look. "Yes Binah, we're ok." Lottie mustered up her courage, "But the Leviathan have the formula. And..."

Binah saw the look on both girls' faces. "Where's Jamie?" She asked, her expression becoming worried.

It took Lottie all her will to not start crying. She glanced at Ellie through the corner of her eye, who was watching her, biting her lip.

"He ran away. We can't find him." Ellie said quietly, so only Binah could hear. She gasped. "Have you tried calling him?"

Lottie nodded. "He won't answer." she whispered. A tear escaped her eyes. She sniffed. Binah immediately pulled her into a tight hug, not unlike the hug she gave her after giving Lottie a tour around school back in her first year.

"We'll find him." Binah whispered. Lottie nodded. She hoped so. Because now that he was gone, she felt lost. She felt empty. She wanted him back.

"Binah! Ellie! Lottie!"

All three girls turned to see Anastacia, Lola, and Micky walking towards them.

Lottie wiped her cheeks. She didn't want anyone to see her like this. She reached out for Ellie's hand.

"Hey guys." The two said in sync. Lottie managed a small smile.

Lola stopped smiling. "Where's Jamie?" she asked, the syrupy sweetness in her tone replaced by fear. Lottie gulped.

"He's missing." Binah spoke. She poked her glasses up her nose. Lottie didn't know how long she could keep up the facade until she broke.

Micky's mouth dropped open, his lollipop falling to the ground.

Silence enveloped the group, suffocating and stifling. Anastacia spoke. "Is it because of Leviathan?" she whispered.

Lottie froze. She knew the reason why Jamie left. Even if Ellie didn't. She had been asked many times, and every time she claimed she didn't know why. Her palms grew clammy, her clasp of Ellie's hand tightning.

Jamie, help me. Please.

"I don't k-know..." she stuttered. She suddenly felt hot and suffocated in her cardigan. "Excuse me." she gasped.

She ran away from the group, tears trailing down her cheeks as she weaved her way through clumps of students.

She reached the hiding spot where Jamie chased her to in when she first met him. Before she knew about Partizans. Before she became a Portman. Before Leviathan. Before falling in love with Jamie Volk.

She sat down at a stone bench, finally breaking into sobs.

She sat there, sobbing loudly into her hands. She could almost her his distant voice, his intense hazel eyes staring into hers.

'Lottie... You're just a kid.'

Her heart felt like it was being wrenched open.

'I can't stand that being taken away from you.'

Come back Jamie.. please.

Come back to me.

Please.