Killer Queen|✔️ (Book 1)

21. Just Give Me What I Want and No One Gets Hurt

'This is the ugliest shade of brown I've ever seen...not that I like any of them. Brown is on my most hated colors list, right along with forest green, goldenrod, navy blue and indigo. Like, what the fuck is indigo? Is it blue or purple? It's too close to call. If I'm trying to color, I'm probably trying to get away from the stresses of life, not walk right into an indigo mind fuck and get stressed out more.'

    

    That's what I remember thinking to myself as I crouched on the floor of my grandmother's bathroom, staring at her beige colored sink mat, as I dug through her cabinets. I'd gone over there Christmas night, under the guise of wanting to visit. Even though I wasn't close with my dad, I was still close with my grandmother, so it wasn't usual for me to stop over a few nights a week to shoot the shit. But I had different intentions on this visit.

     
    I knew she had stacks of plastic containers filled with prescriptions that she no longer took but just never threw away. I'd never cared about them before, but now they were all I wanted. Problem was, I had to sift through all the blood thinners and diuretics, to get to the good stuff.

G: "Did Ted Bundy kill just women or was he an equal opportunity killer?"
I poked my head out of the bathroom, to see her eyes glued to the I.D. Discovery channel, watching whatever show about murder and mayhem that was on.
T: "Uncle Teddy? I'm not entirely sure. I'll ask next time I go visit."
I swore my grandmother was a five year old dressed in a sixty-something year old's costume. She said the most ridiculous things and actually meant it as a legit question.
G: "I'll tell you what, if anyone ever breaks in here and rapes me, I hope they do it on the bed. I don't think I'd be able to get back up off the floor."
I felt my hand hit the bottom of the bin, as I was finally done going through the last of the pills. I found a decent sized bottle full of Hydrocodone, a few smaller bottles of oxys, a bottle of Vicodin, and a box of fentanyl patches.

     I threw them all in my purse and tried to put everything back the way I'd found it, before rejoining her in the bedroom, but I knew the chances of her needing anything out of those bins any time soon were pretty slim.
G: "What were you doing in there?"
She turned her body to look at me, as she lay across the bed on her stomach; kicking her feet back and forth like a child watching Sesame Street.
T: "...I had a splinter I was trying to get out, nosy. If I wanted you to know what I was doing, I would've told you. That's why none of your church friends come to visit anymore; because you're such a busy body."
G: "Don't talk about me behind my back, right in front of me. Besides, they don't come anymore because they all got too fat to leave the house. Everyone just happens to find the lord when they get fat. Isn't that a coincidence?"
She squinted and pointed at me, like she was real intuitive and they weren't fooling her.
G: "I thought you were doing you're makeup and going out. You should take me with you one of these times. I got a fresh box of insulin and you know 911; we could have some fun." 
T: "I'm not taking you anywhere. You flirt with all the young boys too much, trying to coug. It's embarrassing."
G: "...You're the kind of girl my mother wouldn't let me play with."

     
    She turned back to the TV, as I got up to leave. I wanted to get out of there before I was overridden with guilt and put the pills back.
G: "Have you ever seen that show about the Indian boy with the three legs, on the health channel? You think he counts as two kids on the soccer team?" 
T: "This is why grandpa used to stay at the bar all night. I have to go meet Pen."
G: "Oh come on, we were having fun. Just tell her a little white lie that you can't go." 
I looked at her, smiling at me like I was still her innocent grandchild; completely unbeknownst that I had a stolen pharmacy in my purse. It made me sick inside. I knew I wasn't this kind of person.
T: "I only tell off-grey lies. They're too dirty to ever stay white."