Hush

Chapter 15: Cookies and Cream

I love children, I really do. They just have this innocent yet somehow raw view of the world. It's so careless and uncomfortably honest. I guess I envy them, in a way, because I barely got to see the world like that as a child. I had to replace my lenses way too quickly, change them from childish wonder to cruel maturity. And I see them, being so small, so unaware, and I guess I wish that were me.

But as of now, I literally cannot exist within the same house as Maria's six other friends. They're adorable and wonderful and also way too much. I escaped with the excuse of doing exercise (which I never do but probably should) and now I find myself wandering around the neighborhood, messing with my phone. I bet that if one of the many old ladies who live on this area were to look out from their windows and see me they would probably scoff and grumble "teenagers these days" with a disappointed tone as if her generation was any better objectively speaking.

Lafayette isn't on the house either, he said something about hanging out with Adrienne. I assume they're doing club related stuff, not the first time they do it on the weekend. Which leaves Burr, Neddy, and Thomas on their own to deal with the girls. Sorry not sorry, guys.

After checking there are no cars coming and crossing the road again, I read over Kitty's message and choke a laugh. Where does this girl get this shit? I'm guessing it's Hercules, based on all the weird shit he knows, but I would pretty much believe anything that came from her at this point.

Blondie: ya heard abt mr steubens party?

Alexander Hamilton: Parti??

Alexander Hamilton: **Party

Alexander Hamilton: As if an alcoholc and music and crazy dancing/party/?

Blondie: yeah this w/e. really wild shit aprntly. obvs were nt gonna be able to come bt I rly wanna know what haps there

Alexander Hamilton: You're literally so nosy

Blondie: whatever hammie <3 ya thnk hell be to go to school on mon? cus i busted my ass doin French hw and I want my work to be appreciated lmao

Unconsciously I start biting at my polished nails. French class has sure become... difficult lately and I can't help but get a little frustrated just to think about it. And it's not because of the course material or the accent but because of certain South Carolinian who sits on the back. He always has. He never participated much and is one of the few Seniors in that class. That combined with his well-known reputation made me aware of his pretense. That's all. Aware. But then I met him, and I fell for him, and now I feel as if every organ of my body is being squished every day I have to spend an hour so close to John Laurens without being able to even look at him without looking suspicious. It's torture, I dare to say. My idiotic lovesick heart can't handle this.

Alexander Hamilton: And how're you planning on finding out what happens there?

Alexander Hamilton: You got a secret source somewhere, Kitts?

Alexander Hamilton: **Kitty

While she starts to type her answer I look up to make sure I haven't wandered off to the middle of anywhere. But no, in fact the only middle I am is around the middle of the neighborhood, in a tiny green area with a few benches. Way smaller than the neighborhood park. And there, sitting beside the tree, is a curly haired figure giving his back to me. I smile, biting my lips with a sudden thrill of happiness caused by this coincidence what wasn't there a second ago. This has become a little too familiar, finding John turned from me. And as always, I walk up to him without even thinking once.