Draco Malfoy x Reader One Shots

The Not So Perfect Day

Fred and George

It was going to be brilliant. The prank to top all pranks, one might even say.

The only problem was that it required sneaking into the Forbidden Forest to collect a certain... 'ingredient'.

For the Weasley twins, this did not mean the end. Only a little more planning. Besides, they had reasoned, it was hardly as if Hogwarts had state of the art security - or even just a basic understanding of safety precautions. In fact, Fred expected it would be much easier to get in if he simply got himself into a little trouble, given the Professors' track record with punishments. That idea was of course veto'd, lest things not quite go to plan. So there they were, hiding behind a bush early Tuesday morning, eying up the dark expanse of trees instead of all the mouth watering foods that would surely be laid out on the Gryffindor table at that very moment.

"This might not have been the best idea, George." Fred said.

"I was thinking the same thing, Fred."

But it was too late now. Now, people were inside, eating breakfast, and the twins were sneaking across the field, heading for the Forest.

Once they were among the trees, they slowed their pace but didn't relax. Keeping an eye out for any of the number of things that could and probably would kill them given half the chance, they strolled deeper into the woods.

Alas, things did not go according to plan.

See, they were only halfway to their location when they heard it. It was a twig snapping or a branch breaking, and it was followed by bushes rustling and a soft thud.

George swallowed. "You hear that, Fred?"

Fred nodded. He didn't think continuing to talk aloud was the safest decision right about now.

So instead, he issued an array of exaggerated hand motions he did not understand the meaning of - if they even had one - and started towards the sound slowly, reaching for his wand.

When they were practically upon the said location, they hesitated, glanced at each other, and then burst through the bush.

"Aha!" Fred cried.

Wait.

He blinked.

What?

Pressed against the tree by non other than Draco Malfoy, the Bouncing Ferret, was their younger (brother/sister/sibling). And they weren't exactly fighting.

Upon hearing the twins' grand entrance, the pair broke away to look over at them, clearly startled.

"Weasels." Malfoy greeted coldly.

(Y/n) tapped his arm. "Hey." (He/she/they) half reminded and half warned the blond.

He shot (him/her/them) an apologetic look that startled the Weasley twins all over again. Much more of this, and Fred expected they'd have to be apparated to the infirmary. After all, there was only so much a heart could take.

"What's going on here, then?" George asked, eyebrows raised.

"You tell me." (Y/n) responded, folding (his/her/their) arms. "What are you two doing out here?"

"Not snogging Malfoy, that's for sure." Fred said.

(Y/n) narrowed (his/her/their) eyes.

George winked.

(He/she/they) flushed as red as (his/her/their) hair and stormed off, a slightly started Malfoy in tow.

Fred looked at George. Oh, could they have fun with this.

"So much better than breakfast." George said.

"Don't know what we were thinking." Fred agreed.

Ron

Ron's day had started out perfectly fine. He'd eaten until his stomach hurt at breakfast (despite Hermione's horrified stares), hung out in the Gryffindor Common Room with Harry, Dean, and Seamus, and then practiced Quidditch until noon. But nobody had warned him that this was all a trap. Nobody had told him that walking into the castle was where things would go horribly, irreversibly wrong, and he was most certainly not informed when he woke up that morning that he'd want to pull out his own eyes and stuff them in his ears only mere hours later.

It was his decision to take the quieter route to the Great Hall that really did him in. Why did he have to do that? Stupid. It was very stupid. He should have just gone the same way he did every single morning. Sod variety.

See, it was upon strolling peacefully down the corridor that he heard it.

His (brother/sister/sibling)'s voice, murmuring quietly to someone that they were beautiful in this light. They must have been behind a pillar, then, sat in one of the alcoves before the windows.

Ron didn't know who (he/she/they) were talking to. He assumed it was the Ravenclaw kid (he/she/they) took to the Yule Ball.

But then he heard it.

"Are you sweet talking me, Weasley?"

No. Ron's eyes had widened in alarm. Merlin, please no. Tell him that wasn't Malfoy.

He sped up, ignoring the soft laugh and whispered response from his twin as he rounded the corner, hoping to disprove his theory.

He was, of course, horribly correct.

There, leaning against the wall, arms wrapped loosely around (y/n)'s waist, was the Slytherin Ponce himself.

"No!" He wailed. Someone up there was laughing at him right about now.

(Y/n)'s eyes widened and (he/she/they) broke away from Malfoy. "Ron-" (He/she/they) didn't seem to know what to say.

Malfoy just smirked. "Weasley."
Smug bastard. Smug, smarmy, snake loving git.

Ron did not realize he had launched himself at Malfoy until (y/n) was between them, holding Ron by the shoulders.

"Calm down." (He/she/they) advised. "It's really not that bad. Just relax a little."

Not that bad? Not that bad?! Getting a soapy Every Flavour Bean was not that bad. Having Gnomes in your garden was not that bad. This was very bad.

Ron let out a battle cry and struggled to escape (y/n)'s grip, but (he/she/they) wouldn't budge. Soon realizing murder was futile, he settled for a well practiced death glare.

"Ron, come on..." (He/she/they) tried. "Just try to keep an open mind."

He pulled himself out of (his/her/their) grip and folded his arms sulkily. "You want me to ask You-Know-Who to come over for a chat while I'm at it?" He said, scowling at the smirk Malfoy shot him.

Before (y/n) could respond one way or the other, a second pair of voices chimed in.

"What do you say, Fred? You think he knows?"

"Looks like it, George."

Ron spun around to gape at his brothers, who were observing the situation before them calmly.

"You knew?!"

"It's conceivable that we-"

"-had some knowledge of it-"

"- Yes."

Ron threw his arms up in the air. "And nobody thought to tell me?"

"Can you blame them, Weasley?" Malfoy sneered, pushing off of the wall and stalking out into the corridor. "If you get any redder I think you might actually explode."

He pointed threateningly, opening his mouth to back up his gesture with a strongly worded warning, but (y/n) rushed out to join the other males, standing between the twins and the smirking Slytherin arsehole.

"Well, I'm starved. Who wants to go to lunch?" (He/she/they) grabbed Draco's arm and started for the Great Hall. "Let's go."

The blond walked with (him/her/them), no doubt still smirking (slimy git), and after exchanging shrugs, Fred and George followed, leaving Ron standing by the window, perturbed and indignant.

This day was not perfectly fine after all.