I won't give up on you (Cimorelli)

Chapter 4: Amy

Everyone is a wreck and that was expected due to the fact that we just lost Lauren. It has only been a week since Lauren passed away  but it felt like it's been longer and only been week since Lisa disowned Dani as her sister. Today is Lauren's funeral. She was only 14. This was all our fault. If we just talked to her and didn't take sides and made an assumption, she would still be here, happy, and smiling. Alive. Dani played most part of why Lauren was gone. Every lie she told us, the more blind we became because she was our youngest sister except Lisa, who was with Lauren every step of the way. She was the only one who had their eyes open, listening to our little sister's plead, call for help. We don't deserve to be called her sister, we failed that job. I got a dress for Lauren's funeral. Everyone was downstairs. Lisa was the worst out of us. There were bags under her eyes. She's just staring at nothing as Katherine leads her to the car. It's like part of Lisa died along with Lauren. It was silent in the car, no one talking, the tension was so thick so   Christina just drove to the church. Once we got there, we went to our sit. The priest began to talk. We were called up to sing for Lauren. We're singing, 'Party in the USA' in memories of her. It was the first song that we sang together and upload and became famous. We did our famous intro.

" Hey I'm Christina"

" I'm Katherine"

" I'm Lisa"

" I'm Amy"

"..." We all look at Dani. It felt so wrong to do this.

" And I'm Dani"

" And We're Cimorelli" We all say except for Lisa.

" This song is for you, Laur, I miss you so much already," Lisa says on the verge of tears as I sing the first verse.

I hopped off the plane of L.A.X.

With a dream and my cardigan

Welcome to the land of fame excess (wouh)

Am I gonna fit in?

Christina sang the next verse.

Jumped in the cab,

Here I am for the first time

Look to the right and I see the

Hollywood sign

This is all so crazy

Everybody seems so famous

My tummys turnin' and I'm feelin' kinda homesick

Too much pressure and I'm nervous

Lisa sang the next verse with so much pain even though this song was suppose to be a happy one.

That's when the taxi man

Turned on the radio

And a Jay Z song was on

She stops and says, "I can't, not without her." And runs out. Oh please God, help us. Please just bring Lauren back to us so we could fix this problem, fix our mistake. I run after her. I found her on the curb. I sit next to her. She looks up and looks at me with a disappointed look. The only other person, besides Lauren, that she allows for them to hug or touch her is Katherine. I don't know why but it's that. She doesn't let anyone else touch her.

" You aren't Lauren, you are not my ladybug," she spits. It hurt but I know that she's in pain and that fact that I played a part on Lauren killing herself.

" I know that, but you need to say your speech for Lauren," I say pushing my personal feelings aside of how she was acting. 

" Only for Lauren," she says getting up dusting her dress. Lisa entered the church and went to the front. She then began to say her speech.

" Lauren, my baby sister, my mini-me, my look-alike, my ladybug, my best friend, she was the light of my life, she made me a better person, she was my heart. She made me smile when I never wanted to, she made me laugh so hard that I could barely breathe, She made me happy, she tried to be the best little sister she could be for us, for her other sisters, but they didn't see that. There were nights, where she would be screaming at night because of a nightmare, and I would be the one to awake to her scream, to see her in pain and then I was always the one to wake her up knowing that I could do nothing to take her pain away, but the best part of it was she looked at me like I was heaven, a safe place, home. Do you know how that feels to have your younger sister look at you like that, I felt proud and happy to know that I made my sister felt safe. She didn't give up hope for so long, until that day, both that day. She gave her life up to make her siblings happy because she thought that the world would be a better place if she wasn't here but she was wrong, the world needs more of her, it's us that don't deserve her. She didn't even get the chance to turn 15 or 18 or learn how to drive yet. I was supposed to be the one teaching her how to drive, we'd talk for hours about that but now she will never be able to do that nor will I. I was suppose to see her grow up, and to become the amazing woman she would have became but that was taken away from her and from me. My favorite memories with her are when we would go to the beach very early to watch the sunrise and then watch the sunset later in the evening. We didn't talk someday just stared into the ocean and watch the sunset, in each other's company, those memories I cherish the most, the complete utter comfort silence between us, the way, one of us knows what the other was thinking, to be honest, it does seem like we were twins just 4 years apart. I'm proud to be called her sister. I'm proud to call her my sister. I love you so much, Laur, I don't think I could do this without you, I know that I will see you someday again and we will be reunited, just wait for me. I know that you'll be watching over us because without you, Ladybug, this family is so lost." By the end, everyone was crying. Lisa is staring at the coffin that holds Lauren. Soon it was time to carry Lauren's coffin into the cemetery. After the funeral, we all returned home except Lisa who stays behind. She was correct about one thing, this family is lost without Lauren. She was everyone's little ball of sunshine.