Her Mafia Man

Chapter 17 - Deep Wound

Lylani..

I tossed and turned in bed until I finally submitted to the darkness.

*

"I know that anger and frustration you're feeling, and you cannot accept it into your soul. I need you to be strong for me and just forgive. Holding a grudge will not help you heal and won't make you become a better person Lani."

My dad spoke inspirational words to me but I couldn't let go of the pain I felt on the inside. I balled my fist up as I continued to hold onto my breath. I felt betrayed and hatred towards everyone.

"How long do you think you can continue to hold onto your breath? You can't and will not let that dark side take over! I will not let it happen while I'm here alive and breathing!" He continued on. He came towards me and roughly embraced me with his warm hug. I finally let go of my breath and started inhaling and exhaling.

Finally allowing the tears to cascade down onto my cheeks, I hugged my father back. "I-I.." I choked onto my words as he shushed me and continued to make me feel better.

"There are evil people in this world and there are more evil people who control them. You just need to understand and let go or else you'll turn into one of them and I don't want that for you. You are strong and brave. You're a fighter and can get through anything life throws at you. People will come into your life and test your faith and patience, you just have to be stronger than them and don't let that dark side take over under any circumstances Lani!"

*

Letting a deep breath out, I hurtled out of my dream to see it was now morning. I sighed as I got out of bed. It was going to be another boring day in this house; knowing there was nothing for me to do.

I got into the bathroom and brushed my teeth and took a long shower. Now putting on a simple jeans and tank top, I quickly brushed my hair up into a knotty bun.

My father's words kept replaying in my head. He was such a strong man and each day that passes by I kept regretting everything that happened. He made me who I am today and I didn't want him watching over me disappointed.

Quietly opening my bedroom door. I made my way into the kitchen to see Sarina and a few other girls getting breakfast done. I've been here for a good while now and Sarina is my only girl friend. The other girls would try to make conversation with me and others would give me a stink attitude but I didn't care nor bother with them.

"Morning sunshine," I said to Sarina as she giggled at me. I never was too fond of Sarina at first but she defienetly grew onto me. Imagine not having anyone to speak to. She made sure I ate and kept me company when she could. I finally started talking back to her like a normal person would and things weren't as bad as I pictured it would be in my head.

Smiling back at her, I took my dad's words into consideration, "I'm thinking about finishing up school to get my nursing degree," Her face lit up with admiration as she encouraged me that I should, "That's really great, you would be able to take online classes?" She suggested and I knew exactly what she meant.

"I mean, I was thinking about squashing things with Alejandro and stop being a pain to his aśs. I realize I can't continue to go back and forth with him. I'm still young and want more for my life, this is my future were talking about." I really did mean it. The free food and no rent was nice, I was living here for free and wasn't even working anymore but this life wasn't for me.