Forked Roads Back

94 - ARCHIE

BY THE TIME WE get to JFK, Tessa is a mess.

After what happened between us last night, with the news of Andy coming through this morning, I'm not surprised she's shutting down.

Even I'm close to it.

The amount Andy has done for me, being a father figure he was, even through my self-imposed exile, I can't imagine a world without him. A world without Matt has been dark enough. I don't think any of us would be able to come back from losing him as well.

I was determined that he was okay though. Melanie had assured me he had only been in for tests, and although he had initially collapsed, he was talking a few minutes later and is very much conscious now. I keep reiterating that, both for Tessa and myself, and it's that that's keeping me going.

Holding her hand all the way from home to the airport, we got to JFK in record time. I didn't care about speeding tickets, I just wanted to get there.

The private flight check in desk at JFK is slightly different to normal. There isn't really much security, other than a brief body scan, as well as the  normal passport control. When we arrived, despite Lisa saying it would be ready to take off at three, we're told we can board within forty-five minutes, so we just sit and wait.

Tessa hasn't really said much. I know what she's doing - she's shutting off her emotions so she doesn't cry - but I make sure to give her hand a reassuring squeeze, reminding her that I'm still here.

I've been doing all the talking, not wanting her to worry about anything, but as a flight attendant tells us we can board in ten minutes, she wakes up a bit.

I see her head turn towards me in the corner of my eye, and her arm reach out before he fingers touch the side of my cheek.

"I'm very impressed with you, you know," she tells me, turning slightly so she can get a better look at me.

I turn to face her as well. "Yeah?"

She nods. "Yeah. You taking charge. Very business-like." She studies me a bit further before giving me the most beautiful smile I've seen all day. "You're enjoying it, aren't you?"

I was worried she would judge me for it, that she'd hold it against me for continuing on with what my dad had built, but this whole time there hasn't been any judgement, only pride.

"I am actually," I grin. "I never wanted to believe I would, but I am."

The smile she has is better than her being sad, but it's still not touching her eyes. I want so badly want to have the happy woman I had in my arms yesterday. I'd give anything to have her laughing in my ear again.

"And you did what you always dreamed," she whispers, so quietly I almost didn't hear her.

I frown. "What?"

She shakes her head. "It's nothing." Her cheeks are reddening, and I'm wondering if she'd meant for me to hear. She tries to turn away from me but I gently cup my fingers around her chin and turn her head back to me.

"Tess?" I ask again.

She sighs. "It's stupid. You'll think I'm ridiculous."

"Tess, I could never think that."

I drop my hand from her chin and take her hands, letting her tell me in her own time. She looks up before she sighs, resigned, squeezing my hands and playing with my fingers.

"It was something you said to me when we were maybe twelve or thirteen. You said that, if you ever had a say in the company, that you would use the money it makes to help people. And you have. You've helped thousands, maybe hundreds of thousands of people." She looks me in the eye as she adds, "Not just one."